


Love me back to health, Bastard!

by WonderBoyz



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Bars, Betrayal, Bottom Uzumaki Naruto, Bullies, Butlers, Depressed Naruto, Depression, Disowning, Drinking, Family Drama, Gay, Good Itachi, Happy Ending, Heartbreak, Homophobia, Itachi is the voice of reason, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Muteness, Naruto pays for it, Naruto x Sasuke - Freeform, Older Sasuke and Naruto, POV Uchiha Sasuke, POV Uzumaki Naruto, Protective Uchiha Sasuke, Sad Sasuke, Sasuke Uchiha is bad at feeling, Sasuke regrets his past, Sasuke works things out, Top Uchiha Sasuke, friends - Freeform, katanas, mansions, old houses, relationship bashing, sad beginning, upset, upset Sasuke
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-06-10
Packaged: 2019-12-26 02:52:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 24,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18274313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WonderBoyz/pseuds/WonderBoyz
Summary: Sasuke being with Naruto has caused more bad than good. Not only has Sasuke been harassed by anyone with eyes and a mouth plus his family, Naruto has gotten the brunt of it. He can’t deal with knowing he is the reason Naruto constantly comes home bruised bloody, shaking all over in anger and fear. Sasuke loves Naruto too much to stay with him. If he leaves him then they all will leave Naruto alone. Despite Naruto being endlessly infatuated with Sasuke and swearing on everything he knows that things will get better if they just stick through it. Sasuke can’t take a chance of something happening to him.But maybe leaving does more harm than good... can Sasuke even right his never ending wrong?———————-“Jeez, what a guy huh. The ‘so amazing Sasuke Uchiha’ actually did it, he actually broke Naruto.”—HIATUS—





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It starts out brutal and sad right off the bat sorry... but not really. I will show their relationship before Sasuke did this so anyways,,,, eh.

Sasuke sat in his office staring at his screen stuck in his own thoughts. A year ago Sasuke had admitted to Naruto his feelings one night on the roof of Sasuke’s parents house. He was so nervous that he sweated through 3 shirts before sticking with a hoodie. Naruto had stared at him for a good minute before throwing himself at Sasuke laughing about how much he had been waiting for Sasuke to admit it.

Sasuke’s family knew he was gay but always hoped it was just a phase so when they found out about him and Naruto. Shit hit the fan. All Sasuke’s old friends who were connected to his family got on the train with his family about harassing them. In hopes that Sasuke would come to his senses and leave Naruto.

He of course refused once he realized he was in love with the blond.

At their 5 month anniversary they both had snuck Sasuke out of his parents house and into their own apartment. That seemed to be the last straw as his family started targeting Naruto physically as a message for Sasuke. Naruto ended up having to quit his job because of the people waiting outside his work ready to beat him up. Each time he came home beaten Sasuke broke and grew angrier. Naruto didn’t seem to find it as life dangering as Sasuke because whenever Sasuke said he is the problem Naruto would hold him and shake his head. Classic. Sasuke knew damn well if he left Naruto then he wouldn’t be subjected to all that shit, he just couldn’t bring himself to let Naruto go. Too selfish dare he say. Last month however was the last straw after he caught the men in action and watched Naruto get 3 slices on each cheek while he was held down. Helpless.

Today he had to let Naruto go.

 

He came home later than usual, thanks to his 2 hour long drive he took just to figure out if he could even stomach facing the blonde knowing what he planned on saying. But. Of course, it had to be done so here he was. Standing in the doorway of their small shared apartment that they had secretly bought together when they first started dating. He felt out of place and yet horribly at home, he shouldn’t even call himself Narutos. He deserves so damn much better. Sasuke turned to just walk out and come back later after he’s convinced himself more but he heard the overly cheerful loving voice that he’d fallen asleep listening to before. He clenched his fists and walked into the living room to find Naruto wearing Sasuke's dark navy sweater that was slightly too big for him and his blue jeans. Naruto smiled so brightly Sasuke had to look away to not cry right there. He couldn’t cry, he shouldn’t get to. He is about to break Naruto in two and he knew it, it had to be done. He had to be strong for him- for himself.

“Hi, babe! I made supper, I didn’t exactly know what you wanted but I winged it. I made a bunch of things I knew you’d like because I figured you had a hard day at work-“

Sasuke cut him off, “Naruto. Can you- can you sit?”

Naruto stopped and nodded, sitting on the couch. Sasuke walked over and sat next to him, then shifted slightly still feeling uneasy.

Naruto placed his hands on Sasuke's and he had to resist the urge to pull away, he didn’t want this to get any harder. “What’s wrong?”

So much. So much was wrong he couldn’t even fathom words. No- he actually could and that’s what horrified him. Just a small sentence. So small but so huge. So destroying. So demeaning, damaging. _Killing_ even.

Sasuke looked down, “Naruto. Naruto I…” He couldn’t breathe anymore. _Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry._ Naruto didn’t seem to catch on yet that it was a serious conversation, “Sasuke? What’s wrong? Did you already eat, is that what’s up? I don’t mind you know. It can be your lunch or whatever.”

Sasuke inhaled slowly, if he didn’t do it now he would lose his nerve. “Naruto I need to leave you.”

_Silence._

Then a tiny trembling voice spoke, “What?”

Sasuke stared harder at their touching hands and pressed on. “Ever since we started dating all that has happened to you is pain and hurt. Me being with you has caused you suffering. I can’t.. I can’t keep going on knowing me with you is causing this. Knowing I could do something about it.”

He breathed out. He thought saying that would raise a weight off his chest but it only seemed to get heavier. Sasuke dared look up at Naruto and regretted it immediately. Naruto stared into Sasuke's eyes practically boring holes into his head as tears fell from his eyes. His mouth was a thin line as his body trembled unrhythmically. Sasuke pulled his hand away and stood up, “I’m going to grab my um…my things.”

He turned and then heard a choked sob and winced.

“No.”

Sasuke stopped and turned around and faced the now standing Naruto. He looked so different when he wasn’t smiling. He stood tall as his tears still ran and lips trembled.

Sasuke shook his head, “I have to. I have to leave you.”

Naruto stepped closer, “No you don’t...Please.” Sasuke raised his hand and stepped back. He couldn’t let Naruto touch him, he would break.

Naruto stopped and shook more, “Sasuke…”

Sasuke turned back around and walked towards the stairs as he felt a hand on his wrist, “Sasuke please! I can’t- I can’t lose you. Don’t leave, we can work it out really! We can!” He looked at Naruto as he smiled through tears, hopeful he could convince him.

“No we can’t Naruto. We tried already, it only got worse.” Naruto's smile dropped and he pulled Sasuke slightly, “This time it will work, I promise.”

Sasuke pulled away.

Naruto took a step closer and held himself as he slowly lost control of his emotions. Sasuke couldn’t bare it. He was a monster, the devil. He ignored the broken cries that slowly grew louder behind him as he continued to walk to the stairs.

Naruto wiped his eyes and followed Sasuke slowly. He couldn’t process it he couldn’t think straight. It had to be fake it had to. Sasuke wouldn’t do this to him. He wouldn’t. _Right?..._

“Sasuke please! I can’t lose you! I have no one else, please!”

Sasuke ignored it as he stepped into their bedroom and held his breath for a moment to slow his breathing. He opened the closet and grabbed his bag then opened his drawers.

Naruto ran to the door still crying. He stopped for a moment when he saw Sasuke's bag. Now he fully realized it was true now. Sasuke was leaving him- abandoning him. Without any other warnings without time for Naruto to get used to it, though he doubt he would have. Naruto pulled on Sasuke's hand, and frantically begged “No. no you can’t- stop. Stop it!”

Sasuke continued putting his clothes in the bag. Naruto pulled on the bag and cried harder, letting his body shake, “STOP PLEASE! Sasuke listen to me. Listen! Stop it stop!”

Sasuke looked at Naruto's wrecked face and looked away, “I won’t Naruto. Just cut it out, don’t make this any harder than it has to be okay?”

Naruto shook his head still holding the bag strap, “Please, Sasuke. I’m begging you stay with me.”

Sasuke stopped. Cruelty. Sasuke deserved cruelty. Sasuke pulled the bag from Naruto's fists and placed it on the floor.

Naruto held his breath when Sasuke stepped towards him and smiled when he placed his hand on his arms.

Sasuke should be punished for this. This is the worst he had endured. He slowly pushed Naruto backwards and cried inwardly as Naruto's smile grew wider, _he genuinely thought he had convinced me._ _Cruelty. A lot of it._ Once Naruto was past the door frame Sasuke let go and stepped back, “No Naruto.” Naruto's face dropped and he went to step forward.

Sasuke slammed the door and locked it. _Death even._ Naruto banged on the door and wailed, “Sasuke! SASUKEE! Open the door! Please, p-please let me in.” He cried out between gasps of air. Sasuke continued putting his clothes in his bag and finished with the rest of his belongings.

“Sasuke I love you please! Sasuke! Don’t you love me?” He stopped at that and closed his eyes.

“Love me enough to stay! You bastard!”

Sasuke swung the door open and found a slumped on the floor Naruto clutching his face. Naruto looked up and Sasuke found that his eyes turned an angry blue when he cried. The contrast between his puffy red nose somewhat even advanced it.

“Don’t love you enough?! Oh please, Naruto. Because I love you so much I’m leaving. I love you too damn much to stay. Do you hear me?”

Naruto shook harder and winced. “I need you..”

 

Sasuke grabbed his bag and walked past him. Naruto grabbed for him as he walked past “No! No Sasuke you can’t abandon me! I’ll die without you!”

Sasuke started to lose his composure, he could feel himself start to break. He needed to get out. He ignored Naruto as he continued to gasp louder through choked begs of him to stay.

He walked down the stairs.

Sasuke turned towards the door when he felt something come flying by his head. He looked down and found Naruto's orange converse laying by his feet. Sasuke turned towards Naruto who was standing weakly at the top of the stairs and holding the other one trying to breathe properly. “You bastard! How could you even go to leave me? I love you! Do you hear me? Do you hear me Sasuke Uchiha!? I love you! I stayed even though I was hurt and harassed because I knew, I _know_ you are what is good for me. What I want. What I _need_ ”

Sasuke stared at him and clenched his jaw trying to hold himself together for just a while longer.

Naruto grew more upset and wiped his eyes but more tears replaced them. He walked down the stairs still holding the shoe and stood in front of Sasuke. “How dare you… if you leave me you kill me. Do you understand? You. You, Sasuke. You are the only one.” Naruto inhaled shakily “The only one keeping me together. Happy. I wouldn’t smile with you gone. Please don’t hurt me like this..”

Sasuke inhaled softly. He started to slip again. He couldn’t handle knowing that he would be the cause for Naruto to lose his smile, his brightness. Himself. Sasuke weighed it for a moment. Initially it was already made up. Sasuke stared back into Naruto's eyes and saw all their memories, their struggles, the love, caring words and gestures, loving phrases and hearts, warm hands, and now sadness, pain, betrayal, anger, even _fear._ He caused pain and fear in Naruto's eyes. _Monster._ He saw everything Naruto meant, everything he said and wanted to say. He saw it all. It was written there on his tear stained face.

Sasuke let out a choked sigh and looked away. Naruto stepped closer knowing he was getting to him, “Baby..baby look at me. Look me in the eyes and say you need to leave me. No. Look me in the eyes and say you truly deep down _want_ to leave me.”

Sasuke couldn’t look. Naruto knew it. Sasuke breathed through his nose and closed his eyes but opened them again as the memory of Naruto flashed in his mind. He had to go now or it would be for nothing and Naruto would be hurt again. He would cause more pain. Naruto would be fine. He always was, his smile would come back, his life, his… love. Sasuke didn’t care if he himself wouldn’t be fine. He didn’t care if he died prematurely from heartbreak and pain. As long as Naruto lived on happily.

Sasuke looked back into Naruto's eye and let the pain and sorrow and tears he had pent up loose. It swirled him, crushed him. The tears fell and he blinked them out.

Naruto's lip trembled, “Sasuke. I know you love me. I know you want to stay. I know you need to stay. Please just admit it, just put the bag down and come back in with me. Let me love you harder than I ever have before, let me prove you should stay. I’ll do it I will! I just can’t- I can’t bare letting you go.”

More tears fell from Sasuke's eyes. Naruto softly grabbed his face and leaned up kissing his tears away and kissed his cheek, “Sasuke… let me prove it.. please… I promise… it will be worth it… please.. stay” he pleaded between kisses. Naruto looked into his eyes momentarily before kissing his lips softly. Sasuke started to shake as he shook his head. “Naruto no-“

Naruto leaned farther into him and tried to kiss him again but Sasuke held his wrists. “Stop. Don’t…”

Naruto's face changed and twisted through too many emotions and finally landed on helpless. _Helpless._ More tears fell and Naruto's body threatens to shake harder as he inhaled slowly and covered his mouth trying to relax. Sasuke looked away. _Monster._ He grabbed his bag and turned towards the door and grabbed the knob. A thud came from behind him and Sasuke looked back. Naruto held his hand over his heart and leaned against the wall before dropping to the floor and curling in on himself.

Sasuke stared.

Naruto shook and breathed out with a pained sob. Sasuke gasped out a quiet cry in return. _Go now or you won’t leave at all._ He opened the door and closed it behind him. The cold air hit him and Sasuke walked to his car, closed the door and broke down.

He screamed and cried, banging into the steering wheel and his chest until prolonged sobs threatened to strangle him.

He wanted to undo it. He wanted to be with Naruto holding him as they laid in bed falling asleep with his fingers running through his blond hair. Knowing he didn’t do this. _Cruelty. He deserves it._

 

 

Naruto heard the door close and cried out loudly and hyperventilated between sobs and non understandable words. He cried until his eyes couldn’t open and his vision was blurred from tears and his lungs screamed for air. He choked. Gasped. Wailed against the floor and clawed at his chest, face, anything. He hated Sasuke. He hated that he loved him. That he needed him. Even now needed him. Needed him to just come back and kiss him back to health. Hated that he left him. Left him there after he pleaded and said he loved him. Bastard. Naruto shook for a while after his crying subsided and he stared blankly at his hands and slowly fell asleep on the floor.

—

Sasuke stared at the road not daring look at their- Naruto’s apartment. He couldn’t bring himself to move. He should go back. He wanted to. He… needed to.. Naruto would hate him though. Maybe he was just trying to convince himself. He knew Naruto would welcome him back with open arms. Maybe. _Cruelty. Monster. Death._ He stole a glance at the apartment. The lights weren’t off and he contemplated taking care of Naruto and being with him for just one more night. But even that, would be cruel for even Sasuke. Cruel to himself and cruel to Naruto. He loved Naruto. He believed what he was doing was an act of love but maybe not. Maybe it was selfish or out of fear and he was just using his love to mask his deep feelings. Pathetic. Utterly horrific scum actions. Sasuke was a sad joke of a lover.

He looked at the apartment then the clock. The lights hadn’t been shut off for 2 hours. Maybe Naruto wasn’t okay… no he is fine. _Hah yeah okay. No way he is ‘fine’. Just admit you are too scared to go back in and drive away. Continue with your plans and get over it. For Naruto’s sake._

Sasuke started the car and drove away.

  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoot shoot Kiba is pissed

Kiba walked down the street with Akamaru. It was their usual Saturday morning routine, he walked down his block for 30 minutes then walked by Naruto’s place then home. Sometimes he’d even stop by for breakfast if Naruto and Sasuke were awake. Today however, they wouldn’t be stopping by because he had plans. So no detours which he made very clear with Akamaru. 

They rounded Uuzmaki’s street and Akamaru started pulling him down the sidewalk. “Woah boy, what’s up?”

Akamaru barked and pulled Kiba right to Naruto’s doorstep. Kiba sighed. “Akamaru. I told you already we can’t stop by Sasuke's and Naruto’s today. Akamaru whined. Kiba started walking back down the steps but Akamaru growled and bit his arm and pulled. “Hey! Cut it out will ya? What’s got you all worked up?” 

Akamaru only growled once more before sitting right at the door. Kiba glared but gave in, “Alright alright. You want to say hi? Then we will say hi, but only that then we leave.” 

Kiba knocked on the door and waited. Waiting was uncharacteristic to happen whenever a knock came to Uzumaki’s door and it was starting to make him uneasy. He knocked again but louder to which more waiting greeted him not an over energetic blond. Kiba looked at his dog worriedly. Akamaru whined again equally concerned. Kiba banged on the door and yelled, “UZUMAKI! OPEN THIS DOOR, ME AND AKAMARU HAVE BEEN WAITING OUT HERE FOREVER!” Akamaru barked in agreement. More waiting.  _ Damn it.  _ Kiba tried the doorknob and the door gave way.  _Well that’s not good._ He opened the door slowly _._

It was quiet which was -again- uncharacteristic for Naruto’s house. He probably wouldn’t have noticed Naruto’s body lying on the hardwood floor if it hadn’t been for Kiba still holding Akamaru’s leash as he lunged towards him. Kiba’s attention snapped to Naruto and he followed Akamaru more urgently. He turned Naruto on his back and checked his pulse which was beating strong.  _ No wounds except small scratches and floor indents.  _ Kiba wiped away something from Naruto’s cheek and he leaned forward inspecting and inhaled quickly,  _ his face looks like he cried for days.. _ Kiba shook Naruto awake slowly but when he didn’t come to Kiba decided to shake him harder. Naruto began to move and woke up with a sob letting his eyes burst open, “SASUKE!” 

Kiba stared at him frozen. Akamaru hid his tail underneath him. 

Naruto looked around and his swollen hurt blue eyes landed on Kiba. It was so strange to see him without life, Kiba involuntarily shivered. 

Naruto breathed harshly and wiped his eyes, “I’m sorry..” 

“What happened?” 

Naruto began breathing faster and Kiba places a hand on his shoulder. “Sasuke-..... sasuke he…..”

Kiba leaned closer, “Did he hurt you? Tell me Naruto. What happened?”

Naruto pressed his hands into his eyes, “He… he… he left.” He said in a whisper and Kiba had to strain to hear it. 

Sasuke left? But why? What had happened between them that caused Sasuke to leave?

“Why?..”

“He said he needed to leave me because.. because him being with me put me at risk. Because since I’ve been with him I’ve only gotten hurt. Which is true but we could have worked it out.” Naruto looked at him and wiped his nose. 

Kiba frowned and pulled Naruto to his chest. “But you guys were so good, I was rooting for you guys to make it all the way. We all were..Did you try and stop him?”

Naruto nodded, “I begged, I pleaded, promises to be better, to prove to him he should say, I even tried to kiss him but he stopped me. When he left I couldn’t breathe, Kiba. It was like he left and took everything, took my oxygen.” He started to shake and Kiba held him closer. How could Sasuke do this to Naruto? Asshole. Kiba growled and prickled with anger. Jeez, what a guy huh. The ‘so amazing Sasuke Uchiha’ actually did it, he actually broke Naruto. 

“Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.” 

Naruto nodded and stood up slowly. Kiba helped Naruto to the shower and gave him new clothes. He walked out and told Naruto he would be down stairs making food before he closed the door. Naruto looked at himself in the mirror before punching it and taking his clothes off. The shower was warm and Naruto sat on the floor curled up. His knuckles stung from water washing over the cuts. He watched the blood mix with water as it swirled down the drain. 

Naruto’s mind was blank. 

 

He came downstairs dressed and found Kiba was already done with food. It reminded him of the meal he cooked Sasuke last night and he looked away. Kiba walked over smiling but frowned when he saw Naruto’s still bleeding hand, “What the hell?” 

Naruto shrugged sadly, “Mirror.” Is all he could muster. Kiba sighed and proceeded to wrap his hand. 

He ushered Naruto to the table and placed ramen in front of him. Naruto stared at it as Kiba and Akamaru shoveled the food. “Man, this is good ramen. Right Naruto?” 

Nothing. 

“Naruto?” Kiba looked up. Naruto was still staring harshly at his ramen. Kiba poured his remaining noodles into Akamaru's bowl, patted his head and walked next to Naruto. 

“You haven’t even touched it and that’s your favorite ramen! Are you not...hungry?” Kiba winced at the last word. Naruto shook his head and looked away from the bowl. Kiba stared down at him wide eyed. Naruto wasn’t  _ hungry? _ Holy Shit this is bad. Damn Sasuke, you really did a number on him. Kiba picked up and bowl and put it away for later, “Naruto, go sit on the couch and get comfortable.” 

He started doing the dishes and hummed a song, he looked out to the living room but Naruto wasn’t there.  _ Is he still?... _ Sure enough, Naruto hadn’t moved a single inch from his spot. “Naruto..” Kiba placed his hand on his shoulder and squeezed. Naruto looked up and dull blue eyes met his. It was scary beyond belief just how foreign it was for Naruto to not be energetic and happy with the sun practically being outshone by him. Now he was just….. flat. 

“Come on, couch.” Naruto nodded and walked slowly to the couch and having to be directed again to sit. Pretty soon Naruto was buried under blankets with a movie on and hot tea next to him. Kiba checked off boxes in his mental list and before heading to the door. “Naruto, I’m leaving Akamaru here. I’ll be right back okay? If you need anything call me or Akamaru will help.” No answer came. “Okay?” 

A flat response sounded from the other room “Okay.” 

Kiba’s frown deepened as he stalked down the sidewalk making a beeline for Itachi’s place. The only one place he knew Sasuke would be and he was going to make him pay. Or at least get some damn answers then make him pay. Kiba was pissed off and he wasn’t about to relax anytime soon.  

__

Sasuke stared at the spare bedroom ceiling of his brother’s house. He hadn’t slept since he arrived last night. Itachi had opened the door to find a steely Sasuke standing with a bag in hand and a sad aura around him. Itachi looked him up and down before saying, “Damn. You look like shit little brother.” 

Sasuke walked in the house, “I’m only staying for a few days so don’t get used to my company. I’ll stay in the spare, thank-“ he was cut off by a pair of arms pulling him into a hug. He went rigid. “I’m sorry about Naruto.” Itachi whispered to him sincerely. Sasuke sputtered, “Nothing-“ But he broke and cried in Itachi’s arms telling him what he did and what his reasons were. Itachi listened like he always did. Then smacked him on the ear for interrupting his late night meditation. 

When Sasuke finally got in the room and laid in bed he found he couldn’t sleep.  _ Maybe Naruto was able to _ . He wished him good dreams as he stared at the same mark in the ceiling for another 12 hours. Sasuke didn’t mind. He didn’t deserve sleep anyways. 

 

Now however his eyes were too heavy and everything was blurry but still no sleep came. Noise and banging came from outside the door and he heard voices. 

Sasuke listened half-heartedly. 

“Oh why hello, Kiba. What are you doing-“ 

_ Kiba? Why is he here. _

“oh yeah. Sasuke is here I’ll get him, SASUKE, DOOR!” 

Sasuke got up confused and walked out to the front door, Kiba stood looking rather upset. Sasuke went to say something but was punched in the face before he could get a syllable out. He fell to the floor from Kiba’s strength and laid still as he stood over him. “What the hell is wrong with you, Uchiha?” He snarled. Sasuke just looked at him not even attempting to cover his face. 

“I go on my morning walk today with Akamaru, knock on your guy’s door and I get no answer. You want to know why I didn’t get an answer? Well I’ll tell you. I get in the house and find Naruto lying limp on the hardwood floor in a ball.” At that Sasuke's eyes flash pain. 

Kiba glares harder and holds himself back from hitting Sasuke again. “He woke up screaming your name, Sasuke. I had to take care of him,  _ Sasuke _ . He came down stairs from the bathroom with a bloody knuckle from punching a  _ mirror _ . He didn’t even want to eat the ramen I made him.  _ Ramen.”  _ Sasuke stared into Kiba’s enraged eyes. He didn’t eat ramen? Naruto's practical lifeline? How badly did he actually hurt him, did he think it through enough? 

Kiba wasn’t pleased by the lack of apologies and pulled Sasuke up to his face by his shirt. “I don’t know what twisted shit happened to Naruto to make you do this. But whatever it was, is absolutely nothing compared to what you just did. Do you hear me? Am I making myself understood? You just ruined Naruto. His eyes are dull. Nothing is behind them. They are blank, I couldn’t even bare to look at him today. Then I come here with you looking all sorry? Pathetic. You don’t get to be sad.” 

Sasuke breathed out shakily, he's never seen Kiba like this. 

“I had to-“ 

Kiba gripped his shirt tighter. 

“I had to keep Naruto safe. While we were together people started to harass me, which was fine I could handle it. But then they started going after Naruto and my family even joined in. Itachi was the only one who truly cared for Naruto. I couldn’t sit back anymore and watch as the love of my life came home crying to me in fear all bloody and bruised. I couldn’t and I won’t stand for it.” Sasuke sat up. He knew his reason and he knew he was on the side of keeping Naruto safe. In the end Naruto may suffer from it but at least he will be safe from harm. 

Kiba’s glare falters as he stood up straight, “I didn’t know that, I’m sorry Sasuke.” 

Sasuke waved him off. He knew Kiba came to protect Naruto. At least he’d have his friends to watch over him. 

Kiba looked over at Itachi who was sipping on a cup of tea, “Sorry for barging in, Tachi.” Itachi took another sip, “No worries. I’m used to this type of thing. Besides, it’s entertaining to watch and you have a mean right hook.” 

Kiba grinned and Sasuke glared at his brother. Kiba stepped back and straightened his leather jacket and ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t expect anything from you. Though, I can’t say the same for Nar. He is a mess and he isn’t the same and he probably won’t be for awhile. But he has me, Akamaru, Shikamaru, Choji, dare I even say Neji, and everyone else who cares for him. Even so it won't be you. Which pisses me off to no extent because I will know that each day that he is getting worse or better and we all are busting our  _ asses _ to care for him. He will be only wanting it to be you. Now you take a moment and swallow that before I go.”

Sasuke looked down at the floor, it did sink in. It sank in hard and hit the bottom at 100 mph. It wrenched his heart out, he knew Naruto would only want him. He whispered slowly, “I’m sorry. I am. I know I don’t get to be sorry, but I know I’m allowed to feel the pain of knowing I can’t take it back. Knowing I’m the cause of Naruto’s suffering. I hope he is fine, better than fine. He deserves it, he didn’t deserve what I gave him. He deserved what he asked of me. Deserved me staying when he begged and cried for me. I should have kissed him goodbye, he tried to ya know? He probably told you. I couldn’t even kiss him. Pathetic.” 

Kiba sighed, “Listen man. I’m real mad at you for what you did but I hope you are okay too. I know breakups can be hard, but if you ever need anything at all. I’ll be here, I may punch you again, but I’ll be here.” 

Sasuke nodded. 

With that Kiba saluted to Itachi and walked back to Naruto’s. He stopped by the store and grabbed Naruto some things and a change of clothes. Kiba figured he would stay awhile. 

He got in the house and put the food away. Kiba walked into the living room and found Naruto staring out through the window. Naruto looked odd frowning at the world. He spoke then, “How was Sasuke?” 

Kiba stopped, “What?” 

Naruto turned to look at him then continued staring outside, “I’m not stupid. I knew where you went, how is he?” 

Kiba stood behind Naruto, “Well… I kinda was mad and punched him- in your honor of course. But he looked like shit, didn’t even fight me hitting him, had bags under his eyes. He apologized too… why didn’t you tell me you were getting harassed? I would have done something.” 

Naruto didn’t speak. So Kiba ventured on, “We all would have protected you or done something. You know that better than anyone...Anyways. He's staying at Itachi’s. Said he should have kissed you goodbye-“ 

“Stop.”

“Huh?”

“I said stop.” Naruto turned to face Kiba, his expression cold. “I don’t want to hear anymore.”

Kiba nodded, “Well Alright, that’s fine. I bought you some more ramen incase you get hungry. If you don’t mind the company, I’ll stay here for a few nights.” 

Naruto nodded slowly, “Yeah. I think.. I think I need company.” Kiba smiled warmly. Akamaru romped in and practically knocked Kiba over, “Hey boy! Were you good for Naruto? I got you treats, want some?” Akamaru barked a yes and ran off. Kiba smiled up at Naruto but no happiness was returned. Naruto turned back to the window without another word. 

 

That was how he would stay for another week, that’s when it got worse. Kiba had stayed for a few days helping Uzumaki and pretty much nurse him, eventually Kiba had to go home. So now it was Shikamaru who took Kiba’s place. It took coaxing for Naruto to let Kiba tell Shikamaru about everything, but he finally agreed to him knowing. The rest of the group already found out from Itachi so wasn’t much to do besides make sure they stayed away from Naruto. He hadn’t left his house in a week and hardly spoke, when he did it was noises of agreement or disagreement. Each day his eyes got darker and duller. The first day Shikamaru saw Naruto his jaw dropped to the floor. Despite Shikamaru not being one for work, he was out doing Kiba by the third day. 

Although, Naruto was just gone. 

 


	3. Chapter 3

A month went by and Naruto wasn’t better. He barely ate unless Kiba threatened to steal his hoodies away if he didn’t or Sakura bugging him constantly. Sakura being a nurse served them well when it came to Naruto’s mental and physical state. She grew more worried as the days pile up that Naruto doesn’t step out of his house, or smile. Can you imagine? Naruto Uzumaki, the light of everyone’s life, the epitome of sunshine itself not smiling for a month. It was doing numbers on the group as a whole. 

Without Naruto’s charismatic energetic personality around to make things smoother and better, lives started to fall apart at the seams. Sakura couldn’t find a way to get Naruto out of his head. He didn’t even move a muscle or blink when his favorite band came on the radio. Let alone when ramen was placed in front of him. She was getting more stressed and the lines on her forehead increased by the hour. 

 

Today was her turn ‘visiting’ Naruto. Everyone knew it was actually her shift to care for him. “Naruto, I’m here.” Like usual no answer. She expected it. Sakura walked upstairs to his bedroom knowing exactly where he was. As the time went on Naruto migrated from staying in the dining room all day to the kitchen, living room, and now he barely left his bed. Sakura found him lying on his side with his back facing her. He wore Sasuke's blue navy sweater he hadn’t wanted to take off in a month, only saying it smelt like Sasuke when Sakura tried to pry it out of his grasp. She let it go out of pure shock being how that was the only time Naruto had spoken a full sentence in awhile. 

She sat on the bed and rubbed his arm, “Hey, how are you feeling?” 

No reply, but a shrug. Sakura nodded and placed her hand to his forehead.  _ No fever but he’s cold.  _ She pulled the blanket around him more, “I’m going to make food, any suggestions?” 

Nothing again.  _ Expected.  _ “Well, if you need anything, let me know okay?” 

Knowing no answer will come she got up and walked downstairs. No matter if Naruto liked it or not, she had the music filling the house whenever Sakura was here. It made the place less quiet, empty, sad. Besides, deep down somewhere in Naruto’s soul Sakura knew Naruto was singing along. 

—

 

 

Cruelty. Sasuke got it. Since the day Kiba came in, Sasuke has endured cruelty for his actions. His old friends who abused him and Naruto now abused him harder than before, his family constantly spoke harsh about him and his decision. Stopping by Itachi’s just to remind him they knew it wasn’t going to last. Sasuke got colder, sharper around the edges and hardly did anything but snap and glare all the time. At night when he was alone Sasuke would cry himself to sleep. Then wake up in the morning and hate everything. Kiba stopped by a few times every other week like he said he would. But whenever Sasuke would ask about Naruto, Kiba shut down and changed the subject. 

Sasuke hoped that just meant he was doing really well and Kiba didn't want to hurt his feelings. He had doubts. 

A month could do a lot to a person and he got less than he thought he deserved. He said he wanted to take the pain of it all knowing Naruto would be better. But he didn’t even know how Naruto was and that was the worst part of unknowing anxiousness. 

 

Itachi was letting him stay there for however long he needed but Sasuke didn’t want to stay long. He couldn’t. Sasuke already looked at apartments in another state and jobs there too. If he found something he would go. There was absolutely no way Sasuke would stay in the same town as Naruto. Too much pain in chance encounters. Starting over fresh might do him some good. 

  
*  
  


Sakura set up the table real nice and smiled at herself.  _ Perfect.  _ She walked back up to Naruto’s room and found him sleeping.  _ Hmm well, there goes lunch.  _ Sakura stared at him as he slept, which would be weird if she wasn’t checking for something. He twitched here and there but the thing that got Sakura was that fact he still had nightmare of that night. Sure enough Naruto began moving around and whimpering Sasuke's name. Sakura rubbed his cheek until he woke up slowly and blinked sleep away. He looked at her sadly and she kissed his forehead. “Let’s go sleepyhead, lunch.” 

They ate in silence and Sakura pondered something she had been contemplating for awhile. On one hand it was really quite possibly the only way to get Naruto out of his head then the other, it could fail in some unknown weird impossible way. “Have you talked to Iruka and Kakashi?” She finally asked breaking the silence. Naruto froze and shook his head. 

He hadn’t thought about saying anything to his adopted dad’s. It hadn’t crossed his mind and now he was beginning to have anxiety of it. 

Sakura noticed his breathing and body language with a sad frown, “Naruto do not worry. Was just a question, now eat.” 

He nodded and continued to slowly nibble his food. 

 

Sakura tucked Naruto back in bed and rubbed his head until he fell asleep. She sat in the rocking chair across from his bed and thought some more. Sakura pulled her phone out and dialed a number, after a few rings it connected, “Kakashi, is Iruka there? It’s about Naruto.” 

 

Naruto dreamed or should he say he had nightmares. It was always the same one; Sasuke said he was leaving and when Naruto said he loved him Sasuke turned around and laughed coldly saying he never loved him and he needed to stop crying. Which led to more crying and Naruto yelling his name as Sasuke walked out the door. Then he woke up. 

The first few times he had them, Naruto woke up crying. Now he just woke up weaker than he did before. He lost emotion and only cried when certain things reminded him of Sasuke or he smelled Sasuke's shirt. Otherwise? Nothing. His friends had formed their own nursing system around him to make sure nothing happened. Doubted anything would unless he croaked from a broken heart. He felt like he could. Naruto had wished Sasuke to come back for the first few weeks, now he barely thought of anything involving Sasuke doing anything but smile. He only thought about Sasuke smiling otherwise it was too painful. For now he would stay in his dark mute world until something shook him out of it. 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah Yes some father son bonding time and Sasuke is still hopeless *le sigh*

Sakura heard a knock on the door an hour later. Naruto was still sleeping like usual. She had gotten off the phone with Iruka after explaining everything of what she knew in detail and what she has seen from Naruto. Iruka said he would be right there, and hung up. 

Sakura opened the door and found a very concerned Iruka holding a box and a mildly relaxed Kakashi leaning against the door. “Come on guys, Naruto is sleeping.” 

Iruka nodded, “That’s not good, he’s real bad. Kakashi, stay here okay. I might have you go talk to Sasuke if anything.” 

“Of course. You know him better than anyone.” Kakashi smiled. 

Iruka squeezed his hand and walked up the stairs slowly. He stopped outside the door hesitating as he held the knob, breathed out and walked through. The room was full of sunlight with orange and black everywhere in the room. Iruka put the box down and walked next to the lump of blankets that was Naruto. He looked upset as he dreamed and he was crying softly out for Sasuke. Iruka tsked and sat on the bed, slowly he woke Naruto up. 

“Naruto, darling. Wake up please, it’s Iruka.” 

Naruto opened his eyes and Iruka had to refrain from crying. His eyes. They were so colorless…  _ this is bad.  _ Naruto rubbed his eyes, “Iru-Iruka?” 

He nodded and rubbed Naruto’s cheek, “Yeah it’s me. What’s going on? You’re laying in bed on a sunny Sunday afternoon, you never do that unless something is wrong.” 

Naruto sat up and stared out the window blankly. Iruka waited patiently, he knew Naruto was struggling with getting words to come out. Finally he mumbled out something, “Did Sakura call you?” 

Iruka nodded, “Yes she did and I’m mildly offended you didn’t call me in the first place but I’ll let it slide for now on the account that you tell me what is wrong.” Naruto didn’t blink. The bags under his eyes were deep and his eyelids saged over his eyes.  _ Tired. But sleeps all day.  _

“Tired.”

“What else, sweetie?”

“Dark, tired. I feel like Shit all the time. I don’t have the willpower to eat, to speak, to even go outside. I tried smiling but felt pain in my chest. It’s even a struggle to speak now. What’s wrong with me?” Naruto looked at Iruka then. Iruka sighed, “That’s a broken heart. That’s the easy part to diagnose, but the hard part is everything else that comes with it. Depression, anxiety, many things. Sakura called me just in time. I’m your dad and I love you so much, it’s my willing job to help you out. To ease your pain.” 

Naruto nodded. 

“What else is wrong?”

“I can’t stop thinking about him. I want him back.” Naruto looked at his hands. “I want him to hold me and love me back to health. I need him too. I don’t know if I can go on normally. Maybe later I can do what I used to do but it won’t be full of me. He took part of me when he left and I..” Naruto clenched his fists until the knuckles turned white “I hate him for that. But I can’t hate him. I loved him, Iruka. I love him.” Naruto looked up with tears in his eyes. Iruka pulled Naruto to him and rubbed his hair, “I know. Sakura told me what his reasonings were and they are honorable reasons. I'm just saddened it ended like this. That it wasn’t mutual.”

Iruka wiped Naruto’s tears away, “Mr. you need to get out of this funk, this dark corner of your mind you are constantly living in and go out. Get out and live again. Now I know it’s scary to think about doing all now, which is why me and Kakashi will be relieving your friends of duty while we stay here and help you. I plan on helping you out and hopefully you feel better in the end.” 

Naruto nodded and wrapped his arms around Iruka and sighed shakily. Iruka smiled against his yellow hair. Naruto started to shake and cry softly into Iruka's shoulder. Iruka didn’t mind, “Shhh shh let it out. Let it all out, it’s okay to miss him. To cry for him for yourself. To cry for everything you lost and wanted. It’s okay.” In response Naruto cried harder. 

Kakashi stood outside the door smiling as he watched his husband comfort Naruto lovingly like he always has. If it wasn’t for Iruka, Kakashi probably would have been a mess too. When the call came from Sakura Kakashi wasn’t expecting it to be about Naruto. Usually when she called it was to ask Iruka for some recipes or Kakashi for another fighting technique. Kakashi leaned in through the doorway of the library and watched Iruka put a stack of books he had bought away. “Iruka, it’s Sakura.” Iruka looked up and smiled, “Is she ready for another recipe? Great, I just made one up yesterday with some herbs-“

Kakashi shook his head, “It’s about Naruto.” 

Iruka's smile dropped and he took the phone. While the conversation was going on Kakashi was ordered around the house to grab suitcases, and other things. Iruka ended the call and Kakashi waited expectantly for an explanation. Iruka bit his lip worriedly, “Naruto and Sasuke broke up a month ago. They all thought he would be better by now but he has only gotten worse. Sakura says he sleeps all day, doesn’t smile, no speaking, and doesn’t eat ramen unless forced, Kakashi. We need to go.” Kakashi nodded and kissed Iruka’s forehead. 

“Of course.” 

While they drove Iruka made frequent stops at stores and such claiming he was making a care box for Naruto. 

“Can’t this car go any faster?” Iruka banged on the dashboard. 

Kakashi pointed to the speedometer “I’m already speeding 10 miles over the speed limit from the last time you told me to go faster. We will get there in enough time, Iruka. Do not worry too much.” Iruka sat back with a grunt. He couldn’t stop worrying until he was next to Naruto. 

So when they arrived at the house Iruka practically pushed Kakashi out the car with the box in hand and ran to the front door. 

 

Iruka pulled back from Naruto and wiped his tears away with a motherly smile. Naruto leaned into the touch but showed no other emotion. This was going to be hard but it will work after a while, maybe he will even be fully better. But that was a stretch. Iruka reached for the box he had left by Naruto’s bed and pulled it to them, “I brought you a care box. I know I get all motherly with these types of things but everything in this box has cured you and even me before.” 

He reached into the box and pulled things out for Naruto to see, “This is Kakashi’s big sweater I wear whenever I’m having a bad day, it smells like him and me so you can be surrounded by other smells than Sasuke's.” Naruto frowned. “Don’t worry Naruto. You can still wear Sasuke's sweater underneath...A box of your favorite chocolates, more ramen, your favorite bands new CD, and if you think of anything else tell me or write it down.” With that Iruka handed Naruto a pad of paper and pen. Naruto’s eyes widened and he nodded taking it, “Thanks.” 

Iruka ruffles his hair, “Not to worry. Now you can look through the box if you wish, I put some more extra stuff in there okay? Me and Kakashi will be downstairs getting the spare room set up and the house clean.” Iruka got up, kissed Naruto’s forehead and walked out the room. Kakashi was waiting for him by the stairs smiling. “What?” 

Kakashi shrugged and wrapped his arms around Iruka’s waist, “It’s nothing really. Just that you’re an amazing father and human being is all.” 

Iruka blushed and waved him off, “Come on, let’s get this house back in order.”

“Yes sir.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. This is the last update that I pre-wrote. Which means I have to write more and that could take awhile 
> 
> Sorry lovies

Naruto stared down at the paper and pen in his hands. He didn’t know how to feel about the whole new turn of events nor did he have the energy to. You’d think with him being so mute and laying around all the time Naruto would be thinking, but his mind was blank. Just dark and quiet. He liked it that way, no disturbance, or loud memories bringing him back to reality. Was safer that way too.

Naruto placed them on his bedside table and lifted the box on the bed. Everything Iruka had shown was there with a few extra miscellaneous items like crossword puzzles, a book, coloring pages and crayons. Naruto inwardly snorted,  _ children things.  _ Was very much like Iruka it was almost saddening.  _ Why? _ Naruto didn’t know why he got sad at certain things, it came with his moods. Naruto placed the box on the floor but left Kakashi’s sweater out. He held it up and looked it over, the tan ADIDAS hoodie looked warm. Naruto looked down at Sasuke's sweater he still wore, smelt it and frowned deeper. With that he dropped Kakashi’s hoodie in the box and laid down again. No drive to get up. No point in doing it. 

  
-

Sakura helped Kakashi bring their luggage into the spare room and talked with Iruka about how she was. After a while she left and walked down the road to Itachi’s, she hadn’t seen Sasuke since everything happened but maybe it was about time. Sakura knocked on the door and waited, finally the door opened.

Itachi stood in the doorway holding a katana, “Well well. I was wondering when you’d make your stop here, I’ll grab Sasuke.” 

He walked into his house and Sakura shifted patiently. Sasuke walked down and stood in front of here for a moment before he spoke, “Coffee?” 

“Yeah.” She said and followed him in. 

 

She sat at the kitchen table waiting as she studied Sasuke. He moved slower but his shoulders were tense,  _ Hmm.  _ Sasuke placed a cup in front of her and sat down, “What is your reason?”

“Huh?” She leaned forward. 

Sasuke crossed his arms, “First it was Kiba who told me what he found and how shitty I am. Then Shikamaru who told me that it was a drag to sit and watch Naruto suffer, then Neji came by to tell me I made a wise decision to protect the one I love. Which hurt more than Kiba’s right hook. So now you are here. What is it?” 

Sakura looked at her coffee and stirred it. “Have they told you about Naruto at all?” 

Sasuke uncrossed his arms and shook his head, “No. I ask Kiba every time he comes but he changes the subject, no one else tells me anything…. how is he?” Sakura looked into his eyes and recognized the pain. 

She sighed, “I.. oh Sasuke you know I can’t. Naruto hasn’t given his permission for me to say anything. He doesn’t even know I’m here.” 

Sasuke placed a hand over his eyes, “Please Sakura. Please tell me how he is, tell me anything. I can’t stand not knowing how he is… please.” He whispered. Sakura sat back, “I can’t tell you anything, Sasuke. I’m sorry. But I can tell you what’s going on around him. Iruka and Kakashi are going to be staying with him for a while until further notice. Which means me and everyone else won’t be by his side all the time. Iruka has a plan for the time he is here, that’s all I’m going to tell you.” 

Sasuke breathed shakily, if Iruka and Kakashi were here then it was bad. Iruka and Kakashi never stayed unless it was for holidays or someone in town was sick. Sakura got up and walked towards the door after she patted Sasukes shoulder. Before she left Sasuke called for her. 

“Sakura…”

“Yeah?”

”Does he hate me?”

Sakura looked at the door before opening it, “No, Sasuke. He doesn’t. In fact, if it’s even possible I think he loves you more.” 

Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek. Why can’t Naruto just hate him so Sasuke can suffer with that. Not suffer knowing Naruto still cares. Sasuke pushed the coffee back,  “Please take care of him. Make sure he knows he is loved, it’s the least I can hope for.”

Sakura nodded and left, closing the door behind her. 

  
  


Sasuke stayed there for awhile before Itachi came in sweaty from his katana lesson. “Did you find out anything?”

Sasuke shook his head. Itachi placed the sword back on its shelf, “They all have told me how he is. I promised to not say anything until Naruto got better, but…. little brother. Naruto is not recovering like you hoped.” 

Sasuke bit his lip holding in tears. Damn it he knew it was bad. Itachi placed his hand on his head and sighed, “Nothing to be done now. I’ll be gone for awhile, so if you are going to look for apartments again make sure you lock up.” 

Sasuke nodded and listened to the sound of Itachi starting a shower. It had crossed his mind a few times over the month he’s been away that Naruto could be not getting better as fast as Sasuke had hoped or perhaps was worse off than Sasuke even was. He pushed it down and thought of other things instead. Not knowing was getting more agonizing. Now however, he had things to go off of and it only made shit worse. 

He stared at his coffee until Itachi came out and left. The relator had gotten back to Sasuke last night about the apartment two states over, he hadn’t decided whether to follow through with looking at the apartment. Couldn’t bring himself to a decision. He’d sleep on it again then make a decision. For now he’d go for another walk around town and sit in a coffee shop. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I make Sasuke move?...... or not. Should Itachi convince Iruka that Naruto and Sasuke should try it out again?..... or no.   
> I can’t decide but eh


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will be figuring out how I want to write this. I have other parts of the story written out already I just need to find a way to connect them which may take awhile.

Kakashi sat with his legs crossed watching Iruka put their clothes away. Iruka was in mother mode and Kakashi knew to not get in his way unless he wanted to get his head ripped off and sleep on the couch. So he sat silently on the bed amusedly listening to Iruka verbally check off boxes in his ‘To Do List’.

“You know, if you keep working yourself up pretty soon smoke will come out of your ears.” Kakashi commented and lifted his book up to his face. He pulled it down slightly and Iruka was staring at him menacingly. _Oops._ Kakashi smiled kindly as Iruka put more clothes away with more force than needed. So maybe he liked getting Iruka worked up, it entertained him.

“Maybe if you stopped reading porn then you could help me put your clothes away.” Iruka said with a grunt as he put his books on the nightstand.

Kakashi didn’t take his eyes away from his book, “You know you’re just going to reorganize it after I’m done.”

Iruka laughed. It was true. Wasn’t that Kakashi had horrible folding and neat skills, he was more orderly than Iruka with most things. But Kakashi knew Iruka liked having the drawers organized and folded a certain way. Iruka sighed and plopped on the bed next to Kakashi.

He rubbed Iruka’s head and turned the page, Iruka closed his eyes and hummed happily.

 

He couldn’t figure out what to do now that they were actually here. Naruto had never been this visibly bad before, it left Iruka racking his brain for a solution.

Kakashi put his book down, “I can feel you thinking. What?”

Iruka smiled apologetically, “I can't figure out what to do. Usually I’d have a plan right away but nothing is happening. I’m blank.”

 

“Well. You always figure it out so play it by day, take it slow. We know him well,Ru….Unfortunately, we haven’t been the one constantly in his life day in and day out knowing how he is and what he has changed. You know who I mean, we might have to ask for advice if things get worse. If anything get him real help, are you ready for that?”

Iruka frowned. In truth he was not completely ready to think about the possibility of Naruto getting actual help if he didn’t get better. Really pissed him off thinking that he wouldn’t be able to pull Naruto out and the thought of asking help from Sasuke made it worse. Not only would it hurt Naruto but it would bug Iruka knowing he had to ask for _help_ to heal his own son.

He didn’t know how to answer so he grunted. Kakashi shook his head and kissed Iruka on the cheek, “I doubt it will come to that anyways. For now try to relax, I’ll get dinner star-“

A knock came from the front door.

Kakashi sat up with a groan leaving Iruka to close his eyes in hope of a solution.

He opened the door surprised.

“Hello, Kakashi. I heard you were in town.”

Kakashi nodded still surprised, “We are. Why are you here?”

 

“Well. I have a problem on my hands and you have one on yours. Something has to be done. Don't you say?” Itachi questioned and tilted his head waiting.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops my finger slipped * shrugs*


	7. Chapter 7

Silence was heavy. Far too heavy and menacing lately. No strength was left in Naruto to lift that weight. Nothing to help him carry half of his problems, _no one._ Naruto stared at the picture of him and Sasuke that sat on the bedside table. It was taken after they had first bought their apartment. Sakura threw them a huge house warming party and took this picture of them sneakily. He was laying draped across the couch leaning on Sasuke’s legs as he sat on the armrest. Naruto felt his heart sigh remembering that day.

 

_Naruto woke up to Sasuke kissing him. He giggled and covered his face, “Stop it. I was having a nice dream.” Sasuke fondly laughed still kissing him, “I’m not sorry. You were too irresistible while you slept. I just had to kiss you.”_

_Naruto peaked between his fingers and Sasuke wiggles his eyebrows before ticking Naruto’s sides. He yelped thrashing until he cried for mercy._

_Sasuke was never cold or off putting with Naruto. Outside of their little world Sasuke was cold, hard, reserved, and very mean. It made Naruto feel special knowing deep down he was the only person to see Sasuke all lovey and a complete pushover. Naruto poked Sasuke in the side, “What time did Sakura say she was coming over today?”_

_Sasuke thought about it, “Mmmm. 2 hours from now.” Naruto nodded and sat up only to be pushed down again._

_“Hey. I need to get ready.” He complained adding a hint of whine to his voice. Sasuke mock frowned, “And I want to kiss you some more.”_

_He leaned down slowly and kissed Naruto until he flipped them over with a smirk._

_“Alright so maybe an hour to get ready won’t hurt.” Naruto shrugged and kissed him again._

 

Heart was definitely sighing. Naruto grabbed the picture and looked at it.

 

_The doorbell rang. The only time that doorbell was ever used since they bought the apartment. Naruto leaned out from the kitchen, “Sasuke. Door.”_

_Sasuke walked through the kitchen and let Sakura in. She insisted on having a housewarming party for them right away, Sasuke had been hesitant but after some persuasion that could be counted as begging and a lot of puppy eyes Sasuke gave in. Of course part of the deal was that everyone else brought food because no way in hell they would all be eating ramen for the night. Sakura would not stand for it. Along with the agreement she would come an hour early to set up and help with anything else around the house Naruto might need. She came into the kitchen with a glass of wine in hand._

_“Hi, Sakura!” Naruto greeted with his infectious smile. Sakura kissed him on the cheek and placed the wine in the fridge. “Hi, Naruto. How’s things going?”_

_Naruto shrugged. “Pretty good. Slow mostly.”_

_Sasuke leaned against the island, “That’s because you get distracted easily and don’t finish one task at a time. Which is why we have so many boxes open and stuff half put away.”_

_Naruto blushed, “Pfft. I finish what I start, right Sasuke?”_

_Sakura rolls her eyes, “Gross.”_

_Sasuke winks and walks away to the other room._

 

Naruto drew his eyebrows together as he studied the picture further.

 

_“Kiba don’t do that! We just bought this place.” Sasuke yelled as Kiba did a backflip off the stairs. He landed gracefully with a shrug._

_Naruto laughed loudly on the couch with a drink in hand. Everyone was here and accounted for. Sakura followed through and helped finish putting everything away within the last hour they had left._

_Sakura sat on the floor talking to Shikamaru who was leaning against the kitchen doorway eating the food Kiba had brought. Neji was talking to Choji as he stuffed his face full heartedly and put some in his lunch bag he brought over. Which was empty by the way, because Choji never brought food, he took it. Lee sat in a chair happily eating his food in silence listening to Sakura and Shika talk._

_There was no music, there was no need. It was perfectly loudly filled with the voices of their friends. The only sounds Naruto could survive on hearing. But most of all it was Sasuke's voice he listened to solely. His snarky comments to Neji and Kiba, the annoyed noises he made at Lee, and the way he sighed silently thinking no one could hear when Naruto burst out laughing._

_Sasuke came back in the kitchen after ushering Kiba away from the stairs and sat on the armrest of the couch. Without thinking Naruto leaned over and held Sasuke's legs to his chest listening to the different things Neji had seen in Hong Kong._

_Sakura has pulled her camera out and snapped the picture without anyone catching her but Shikamaru. Who tiredly laughed and ate more food._

 

_Sakura said goodbye taking the last of the food with her out the door. Sasuke closed it and let out a sigh. Naruto nodded feeling equally as tired and fulfilled. He was cleaning up the living room from Kiba and him wrestling an hour ago with a smile. Sasuke walked in and crossed his arms, “What?”_

_Naruto looked back at him and continued cleaning, “I’m just really happy.”_

_He felt arms wrap around his waist and he leaned into Sasuke. “I am too. But I’m happy, because you’re happy.”_

_Naruto kissed Sasuke's arm that encased him. He now felt warmly lit up inside now. Naruto turned around and placed his hands on Sasuke's chest, “Did you have fun?”_

_Sasuke shrugged, “Hn.” But smiled and kissed Naruto’s forehead._

_Naruto raised an eyebrow but leaned into the kiss. Sometimes Sasuke was so easy to predict but so damn difficult to read. Not that Naruto was complaining. Gave him something to do: figure out Sasuke._

_The kisses trailed down his forehead to his eyes, then his nose, each cheek, and slowly his lips. They pulled back and Naruto gazed into Sasuke's eyes with intent._

_“I know that look…”_

_“Then you better get moving.”_

_Sasuke let out a laugh and picked Naruto up then walked them up the stairs._

 

Naruto put the frame back on the bedside table with force from the memory and turned on his other side. Sasuke and him fit so.. well. It was strange. Someone like Sasuke with someone like Naruto? It was almost expected for them to end up like they did. Naruto let out a puff of annoyed air. Real nice thinking.

His bed seemed to swallow him whole but Naruto felt it comforting. The craving for human contact grew but no matter how many people placed a caring hand upon him or offered a soothing hug. Naruto only craved for one touch, one presence, one voice. His constant denial of such craving was proving to drive him mad. So mad that he pondered whether being alive without fulfilling his craving was even worth it. So unsettling that the mere thought or reminder that he has the craving sets him off on a mental battle. His weakness always proved the deciding factor of whether he would let himself suffer and steep in the knowledge of his impending struggle or let it go and move onto something else.

 

Withdrawals. A drug. Sasuke was his drug. Kept him high, floating, ever happy. He woke up with the drug. He went to sleep with the drug. Even when they were separated, his veins flowed with plentiful amounts of his beautiful drug. Now? Now he was without it. Cut short. Supply had run dry and now his body was starting to panic. Not knowing what to do without it. Cracking under the pressure. Breaking at every turn. Curling in on itself. Inwardly punishing the body for the lack of its lifeline, it’s crutch. Destroying the very core in hopes that with enough pain and persuasion the drug will be given back in amends to being cured. No drug, however, would be given again. It knew this already. Now it punished for a whole different reason, to avenge what was lost. To remind just how much that drug meant to it and how badly it can hurt when it’s gone. Punishment. Punishment for itself and him. Never ending pain and suffering until one finally caved to another appeal.

 

Naruto placed a hand over his heart as the dull ache came back and jabbed him. _Pain and punishment. A reminder. A reminder of loss_.

Nothing. Naruto has nothing to strive for or to get up for. He has no other desire other than to lay in bed and be. Contently he will do so without tiring because what else is to do when your life is ripped out from you and you’re left with nothing but a gaping wound and a longing heart?

The answer would be anything. There is no limitation. However, Naruto’s body has placed limitations and now he followed the rules knowing if he didn’t then he would in turn suffer for being unfit.

The bed took care of him. Gave him comfort for him to sleep. The blankets wrapped him up so he felt warm. Sasuke's sweater brought him security and a sense of belonging. Everything he needs. But without his deepest craving.

Naruto closed his eyes and let himself be pulled into his mind as he drifted to sleep. Letting his body take control and save him from his waking pain. There would be no pain in sleep, unless his dreams tormented him. However. Now he only dreamt of that night with Sasuke after the party.

 

_________

You can see the post I referenced the framed picture from [here.](https://pin.it/gvapevwavym2ea)


	8. Chapter 8

Kakashi nodded and let Itachi in. 

“I’ll grab Iruka. Naruto is upstairs so please keep it down.” 

Itachi nodded curtly and proceeded to sit at the dining table. 

Kakashi briskly walked to the spare room and cleared his throat. Iruka opened one eye, “Who was it?” 

“Itachi. He wishes to talk.” 

Iruka sat up immediately and walked to the dining room where Itachi sat. 

“Coffee?” 

Itachi smiled politely, “Tea would be fine.” 

Iruka nodded and walked into the kitchen. 

Why was Itachi here? They hadn’t seen him in awhile nor was it like Itachi to get into other peoples business. 

Iruka placed a cup of tea in front of Itachi, he sat down across from him and Kakashi stood behind his seat. 

“What is it you’d like to talk about?” 

Itachi sipped his tea, “As you know. Sasuke and Naruto broke up.” 

Iruka nodded. 

“Sasuke is suffering from his decisions as I imagine Naruto is going through worse even. The pretenses that Sasuke served his actions under were very…. misguided. He acted as a scared teenager rather than a mature adult in an adult relationship with many people he could turn to. Something happened while they were together that put Sasuke in the mindset that the only way to keep Naruto out of harms way was to leave him and become a ghost. To his lover, friends, even family. I am the only member of our family Sasuke has not cut out of his life.”

Iruka’s jaw unhinged and crashed to the floor. “You mean he actually disowned his family? Severing everything the Uchiha family offered with their benefits and money?”

Itachi nodded, “I’m afraid so. Of course, one cannot blame him. I’m ashamed to be recognized with my family after everything they have done to him and Naruto.”

“What did they do?”

Itachi leaned back in his seat genuinely confused, “You mean you never knew about anything happening to Naruto? He was in the hospital a few times, I’d imagine they would have called you.” 

Iruka tensed, he could have fainted or thrown up.  _ Oh god.  _ Kakashi grabbed his shoulder to keep him steady. “Hospital?”

Itachi nodded once again. 

He looked up at Kakashi completely lost, did he scold Naruto for not telling him or cry while holding him?

Kakashi picked up where he could not. “Do you know anything about it?” 

“Well of course I do. I’m their son, family dinners are mandatory for everyone so I have heard the things my father has said to Sasuke on the topic. Along with knowing of the actions that played out surrounding just one opinion and goal. You see, Kakashi, my family is not very welcoming to homosexual people. So when Sasuke came out, everyone hoped he would learn to like something else. Well, then Naruto started coming over more often.. you can imagine how it may seem. They pieced it together but denied it in hopes it was just a coincidence. Finally Sasuke declared him and Naruto as an item, it did not sit well.” 

Kakashi squeezed Iruka’s shoulder tighter after he inhaled slowly. Itachi sipped his tea agonizingly slow before continuing, “My father pulled Sasuke into his office one day, I do not know what happened, but it seemed to change Sasuke. Our mother invited Naruto over for dinner, she tried to find a way to be nice as hard as it was, the entire time our father just stared Naruto down. Until finally Sasuke had enough and said he would not let Naruto feel uncomfortable in this house. No one has ever raised their voices to father, mind you. So for Sasuke to do it and be defending his boyfriend, our father was set off. It was a huge fight and Naruto had to pull Sasuke out of the house.” 

Another sip. 

“He never brought Naruto over again but I knew he would sneak out every night just to see him. Our family thought he had finally come to his senses. That was until one night Naruto snuck Sasuke out of the house with all his belongings and ran away here. Something snapped in our fathers head, and he lost any conscious thoughts of being a good understanding person. Our own mother couldn’t even stop him. The Uchiha’s are supposed to be a model of pure perfection, Sasuke was seen as imperfect so he had to be destroyed. What better way to destroy him than go after what he cares for? Our father spread the word of Sasuke's relationship to our outer family and Sasuke’s childhood friends.”

Iruka rubbed his head and clenched his jaw trying to calm himself down.  “I know this gets worse and I need to hear it, but I really don’t want to.” 

Itachi placed his hands on the table and sighed, “I know it’s hard to hear. But for us to move forward and really find a solution. You must know what I know. Anyways, they started targeting Sasuke and Naruto verbally saying they were dirty and disgusting. It slowly gravitated to just them verbally targeting Naruto, and when that didn’t work they moved onto physical.”

Iruka clenched his fist and leaned back, “Tell me they didn’t…” he couldn’t finish the sentence. He didn’t want to think of the possibilities. Iruka already knew what Itachi would tell him would be far worse than anything he could think of. 

 

The room was silent for awhile. The words of Itachi resonating heavy around them all. Then Itachi spoke slowly again, “Naruto’s work was found. They would follow him to his car battering him with words. It carried on for awhile until finally they grew tired of Naruto not reacting so one pushed him. That Naruto reacted to, so they took it a step further and began pushing and punching. Naruto refused to tell anyone how he got the black eye and even kept it from Sasuke. Until Sasuke saw Naruto being beaten outside his work for himself by his old childhood friends. That day Sasuke threatened to throw our father in jail, it was a weak attempt, our father was too high up for that to bother him. So he took another step forward, Naruto was then targeted other places physically. Each time Sasuke found out he became different, less himself. He wouldn’t let anyone near Naruto, almost like he was hiding him from the world. I doubt their friends even know about this because Sasuke hid Naruto from even them, and now I see you guys as well.” 

More silence. More realization. A lot more anger and pain. Kakashi grunted, “That’s a lot to take in at once. Anything else?”

“Yes. I believe from what Sasuke told me, the final straw before Sasuke took it upon himself to rid Naruto of danger was when he came home to find Naruto tending to 3 slices on each cheek from another assault. Sasuke says Naruto uses something to cover them up but they are there. After that Sasuke couldn’t handle anymore.” 

Iruka sat up straight staring at Itachi, “How long has this been going on?”

Itachi shrugged, “They have been dating for about a year… so 14 months.” 

Iruka nodded and smiled, “Oh. Over a year? That’s nice.” Kakashi looked between them and was about to stop Iruka but was too late when he threw himself at Itachi. 

Itachi’s eyes flew wide as Iruka lunged across the table and grabbed his neck, “You mean to tell me you knew about this the entire time and never thought about doing or saying anything? I should wring your neck.” 

Kakashi grabbed Iruka, “Iruka, release, please.” 

Iruka pulled back from Kakashi, “No. You heard him, he knew about it all. Let me have this, Kakashi, I’ll make it quick.”

Kakashi pulled harder and held Iruka away. Itachi sat up and rubbed his neck not looking phased, “I understand your anger, Iruka. Yes perhaps I should have done something-“ 

“Perhaps?!” Iruka wriggled in Kakashi’s arms reaching for Itachi again. 

“I  _ should _ have done something. But Sasuke asked me not to. He said he could take care of Naruto on his own and during that time he did not trust that I was on their side even though I was there through it all and even helped cover for Sasuke when he ran away with Naruto.” 

Iruka seemed to relax slightly at that but still struggled against his restraints, “Why would Sasuke deny help from others who could obviously do more than he could?” 

Itachi raised a hand, “That is the point. Sasuke went into a mode he rarely goes into. He believed he was on his own when it came to caring for Naruto. That anyone else was not as skilled for the job as him and if he dared let anyone try then it may backfire causing more pain and despite whether he wants to admit it or not. Sasuke didn’t want to risk Naruto running from him if he caught a hint of weakness in Sasuke’s ability to protect them, so he ran.”

 

Iruka stopped struggling completely. Sasuke selfishly kept Naruto to himself because he thought he was keeping him safe? Oh if Iruka could just get his hands on his neck, he’d teach him a thing or two about keeping Naruto safe. He pulled from Kakashi’s grasp and straightened his shirt, “Well. That’s certainly is a lot to take in. Thank you for telling us Itachi, now what is it you suppose we all do?” 

Itachi stood as well, “Nothing. Do nothing to provoke them to get together, no matter how much Naruto begs for him to come back for you to bring him back claiming he will make him better or he will die. Do not. Stick with the fundamentals of making him whole without him using Sasuke as a healing tool. I will do the same with Sasuke. He has already been wishiwashi about coming back and falling to his knees asking Naruto for forgiveness. It’s not safe yet, Sasuke needs to clean himself up and take care of his own business before he can think about righting his wrongs. As for Naruto? He needs to be stable before he can have Sasuke back or it will be unhealthy.” 

Kakashi makes a noise of agreement, “I agree. At this stage, Naruto is still grieving. If Sasuke came back into his life it would become an obsession to never lose him again. They might find it soothing but it will be very unhealthy.” 

Iruka crossed his arms, “Naruto will take awhile to heal. Once he falls he falls hard so no doubt it will be a power struggle between his heart and mind. Thank you again, Itachi. It was nice seeing you, we will be in touch.”

Itachi nodded getting the message he overstayed his welcome and Iruka was running low on self control. He walked out and down the steps. 

Kakashi came back into the kitchen staying a safe distance away from Iruka. He stood very still with his eyes closed, breathing rather calmly. Kakashi stepped farther back, “Baby?...”

“Shh. Let me just… let me breathe.” 

Kakashi nodded and sat down but stood up when Iruka slammed his hands on the table. “Our child! Was in the hospital, being harassed, kept away from family and friends, and we didn’t know at all?!” 

Kakashi stayed silent praying for his life. 

“Our child, Kakashi…” Iruka looked at the ceiling and wiped his eyes. “I’m a horrible father. He couldn’t even call us for help.” 

Kakashi sighed and pulled Iruka to him, “It wasn’t our fault.”

Iruka pulled away, “We had to have done something wrong for him not to have called or asked anyone for help. I mean come on, Kakashi. What was he thinking?” 

Kakashi placed his hand on Iruka’s cheek and raised an eyebrow, “He was thinking with love. Naruto was in love with Sasuke and devoted his entire being into believing Sasuke could protect him and probably believed he was not the reason for his suffering. If I do recall, he is a lot like someone I know in that way. Too helplessly loyal and in love for his own good?”

He gave an annoyed look that clearly stated, ‘this is not the time to bring up my childish actions’. But hung his head.

“I don’t…. today has been so long. I need to lay down and think.” 

Kakashi ushered him out of the room, “Then beat it, I’ll get supper ready.” And sent him off with a kiss. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is short

Naruto woke slowly and looked around his room with half lidded eyes. It’s was darker,  _ dinner time.  _ He sat up slowly and looked out the window that gave a view of the city.  _ Sasuke loved that view.  _ Naruto watched the sun set intertwining his fingers together just like Sasuke used to do. Rubbing his thumb over his other hand mimicking Sasuke’s action Naruto emitted a dry laugh.  _ Pathetic.  _ However Naruto couldn’t stop himself from reenacting their usual routine. He ran his hand up his arm, onto his shoulder and lightly grabbed the side of his neck. Naruto began massaging the tense muscle and let his head roll back. He moved the hand to his jaw massaging slowly then let it rise to his hair and grip. Pulling until it bordered self abuse before letting it trailed back to his hand. Slowly opening his eyes and stared at his intertwined hands. Naruto’s eyes widened as a drop of liquid fell onto his pointer finger. He wiped his eyes not having realized he started crying.  _ Pathetic.  _

 

Naruto pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his head upon them. The cars outside filled the empty space with noise substituting his usual loud volume. He licked his lips and yawned, _thirsty._ To get a drink meant to move. Could he move? Naruto looked at the floor then his legs. _Can I move them?_ He tried. They didn’t move. Naruto frowned. _Again._ This time they moved. Naruto nodded and rose slowly onto his feet, _walk._ Did he have the energy to move? _No._ Naruto sat on the bed again, _water can wait. I’m not even that thirsty._ He laid down once again and closed his eyes. _Maybe sleeping will make me less thirsty._.....................For awhile he waited. Waited for the familiar inviting blanket of black nothing that usually pulled him into sleep. It didn’t come. Naruto sat up, _now I can’t sleep._ He looked at his legs, the floor, and his door. _Try again?_ His legs moved and once again he stood, but didn’t walk. _Move._ One step. Another…. a few more. He opened his bedroom door and now faced the stairs. _Definitely not enough for that._ Naruto sat at the top of the stairs feeling suddenly tired, _oh now I can sleep._ He laid down and closed his eyes, _just for a minute then I’ll go down._

Slowly. A blanket of nothingness creeped over him and he was swept away.  __

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. He did just pass out pretty much on the stairs


	10. Chapter 10

Kakashi finished supper and set the table. Itachi’s surprise visit definitely was unexpected and unsettling. He knew how much Naruto meant to Iruka. So to know that was going on without us knowing or without Iruka getting a 6th scent idea was driving him over a line. Nothing to be done, as Itachi had said, besides get Naruto better. Slowly but surely it would be over. He called for Iruka to come to the table and went for Naruto. Sakura had briefed them on Naruto’s eating routine. 

_ ‘If he is sleeping then you’d slowly wake him up and tell him it’s time to come down. You stay with him until he is at the table. If he is awake you must coax him, it won’t be like when he has just woken up and still out of sorts. Naruto will give trouble if he doesn’t have the energy or real desire for it. Be firm but gentle. You guys will know what to do.’ _

 

Kakashi walked up the stairs but stopped short when he saw a pair of legs hanging over the top of them.  _ The hell? _ He walked up a few more steps and grew more confused by seeing Naruto passed out on the floor hanging half down the stairs. 

“This kid…. Iruka!”

Kakashi rubbed his head as Iruka stood beside him equally perplexed. 

“What happened?” 

Kakashi shrugged, “I just found him like this. I don’t know. It doesn’t look like he fell.”

Iruka took another step up, “Do you think he laid down here on purpose?” 

“Only one way to find out.” 

Kakashi poked Naruto’s leg until he stirred. He opened his eyes and looked at them and just stared. 

Iruka leaned over so he was in Naruto’s line of sight, “Why on earth were you sleeping on the stairs? You could have fallen down them while asleep.” 

Naruto didn’t answer but looked at the ceiling not uttering any reply. Iruka pressed his hands to his hips and clicked his touch, “Alright, niño, lets go.” He walked to Naruto and pulled him up, grunting at his dead weight. Naruto stood and stared at the stairs with a frown, “I got tired… laid down.” 

Iruka squeezes his shoulder, “Food then. Come on, we will help”

Kakashi and Iruka helped Naruto down the stairs to the kitchen table. Kakashi cooked up quite a feast, everything revolving around Naruto and his taste. Iruka kissed his cheek thoughtfully as he placed a bowl already filled in front of Naruto. He stared at it but by some miracle picked up his chopsticks and took a timid mouthful. He took another bite and Iruka released the air he had been holding.  _ There is hope. He is still there, just beaten down. My son will be fine. _

“There is always more where there came from, nene.” 

Naruto nodded still devoted to stuffing his face.  _ He looks more hungry than usual, when was his last good meal?  _ It didn’t matter- well yeah it did but Iruka didn’t need to know. He was eating now and without stopping it seemed, the color in his eyes (If Iruka wanted to believe) brightened for a moment as he ate. Iruka couldn’t even bring himself to eat as he watched his son eat like his life depended on it.  _ It did.  _ It didn’t matter if his food got cold, he could eat later or maybe never again, all that captivated him was watching his son as himself again. Or as he last remembered. Kakashi looked up from his noodles and wiped his mouth then leaned his head on Iruka shoulder.  _ He will be fine, Iruka.  _ He knew what Kakashi meant by the action. It was said without words. 

Naruto licked his lips and stared into his empty bowl hen looked up slowly. He lifted the bowl, “More?..”

Iruka took the bowl nodding, “Of course.” 

Naruto ate 3 bowls. Iruka hadn’t eaten anything but yet he felt full, happily content. Naruto didn’t take their offer of watching a movie as he walked back up the stairs again. He watched him and stared at the stairs as his bedroom door shut. Shut out the world for the night again. Iruka jumped when he felt Kakashi’s hand on his shoulder, he nodded and followed him to the living room. 

“Do you think it will be like that every time?” He prodded a rip on the couch. Kakashi sat next to him, “Like What?”

Iruka gave him a look, “Silent. Introverted. Lost. Sure he ate, Sakura said he doesn’t eat that much and that’s an amazing step. But he just steps away and hides in his room.” 

Kakashi looked at him thinking, he pulled Iruka to his chest and played with his hair. Letting the silence grow. Iruka was about to talk again when he spoke, “In time.” 

“But-“

“In. Time, Iruka. Trust in me, yourself, our  _ son.”  _

It settled something. He needed to believe it would heal in time with their guidance but progress never happened over night, over a meal. It was gradual. Real agonizingly slow sometimes but they needed to believe. So he nodded and leaned into his husbands chest and sighed,  _ gradual.  _

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lifted Weight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A well overdue Sasuke pov.

The large mansion looked minuscule now. His childhood home held no worth to Sasuke anymore. He rang the bell and waited. The loud chime he knew was echoing throughout every room within those walls sounded off. 

Sasuke had unfinished business to attend and he planned on resolving a few things while he was here. After the news of his and Naruto’s  _ rather painful  _ unfortunate breakup his family had invited him for lunch. An invitation Sasuke had scoffed at and tossed to the side with that days junk mail, but Itachi placed it back in his hands with a very unsettling look. It was a wordless suggestion to put an end to a festering open wound. The wound that had started his and Naruto’s problems. The root of it all. Sasuke was against going but he knew it had to be done. Nothing would be same after he left Naru. He would make damn sure of that. 

 

The large aged black door creaked open and their butler greeted him. “Hello, Sasuke. It’s a delight to see you, but I didn’t expect to have well seen you any time soon, at all in fact.” 

Sasuke crossed his arms, “Hn. Well don’t get used to it Clorence. I’m only here to see father.” 

Clorence nodded understanding far more than what was said. Truth be told Clorence was the only one of this household who accepted his choices and Sasuke truly did not hate. 

“Of course. This way.”

 

He was lead down the large hall towards the meal room. The historic white walls with gold trimming hadn’t changed, each crack was in its place standing proud against everything perfectly mannered. It lead to a high ceiling with Japanese art paintings above their heads with a large crystal chandelier hovering over the 50 seater table. His father sat at the head with his mother to his right. Sasuke inhaled slowly and rolled his shoulders back, standing proud and getting ready for their lunch date.  _ Let him say anything out of line. Things won’t go down pleasantly.  _ Clorence announced his arrival and his parents heads looked up at him stopping their conversation. His father stood and motioned for the seat to his left. The usual authoritative aura Sasuke grew up with still radiated off his father and for a moment it dampened his confidence but an image of Naruto flashed in his mind. He shook it off and sat at the table. 

 

“I’m glad you could join us today, we didn’t think you would make it.” His mother said.  _ I wasn’t going to. Thank Itachi that I even came.  _ Sasuke smiled, “Was no trouble at all. I had been planning to see you both soon actually.”

 

Fugaku chimed in, “Ah Yes well, we are glad you have come to your senses. Our house is open to you now whenever you wish to visit.” 

Sasuke put his drink down and stared at the condensation, “Came to my senses?  _ Now  _ I am welcome?”  _ Breathe. One more chance.  _

Mikoto turned to his father with a gasp, “Fugaku! Our son has joined us today for lunch as a family. I plan on eating as such and not discuss anything of the past. There can be times for that later.” 

His father shrugged, “I meant nothing by it. He knows that. Right, Sasuke?” 

 

Sasuke ignored him. Not even 5 minutes into sitting down and his father had took a bash at him and Naruto. It was relentless.  _ Things need to be put to rest.  _ “What is for lunch?” It distracted them as Mikoto went on about their meal and how she had come across it on a date with his father. Which he most pleasantly tuned out.  _ If I can get through this without fighting my father then I won’t bring anything up. I just hope my father can keep his mouth closed for just one hour.  _ It was a worthless hope. There was no way Fugaku could hold a polite conversation while Sasuke’s pain was nagging, practically dancing around them begging to be pointed out. Either way Sasuke would pray each passing minute for a hastleless meal.  _ Just this once please.  _

“So, Sasuke.” His father began again.  _ Ah, so close.  _ He looked up to meet his father's gaze. “What have you been up to? Do you still have your job? Or did you leave that too?” 

A fake smile smacked itself onto his face, “No father. I still have my job, and I still hold my position. Actually, I’m getting promoted next week.” 

Fugaku looked unpleased from the lack of reaction but smiled. “Good. Now did Naruto have a job or did he just depend on you to make the money?” 

 

_ Did he huh?  _ Mikoto put her fork down with force, “Honey.. I thought I said we weren’t going to talk about he past.” Sasuke was chewing furiously.  _ Implying Naruto was lazy and forced me to make all the money even though he knew he was the reason Naruto was forced to leave his job? He is baiting.  _ His father looked at her innocently, “I was just worried about Naruto. It’s a bad situation if his source of money is taken away, don’t want him resorting to other methods.” 

 

“Fugaku..” his mother warned lowly.   _ Baiting. Baiting.  _ Sasuke swallowed the food that had been chewed to a pulp and took another bite so he wouldn’t be tempted to speak. How long has it been since he arrived? Would an early exit be allowed if he made up a false excuse?  _ I could say I was supposed to meet my boss for a mandatory meeting but forgot.  _ It was Saturday.  _ It wouldn’t be convincing.  _ If this kept going it will have to do. If he wasn’t going to stand up for Naruto then he wouldn’t stay. Sasuke didn’t know which was worse. 

Mikoto placed her hand over his, “How have you been?” What a question.  _ How have I been? _ Does crying every night or at the tiniest reminder of Naruto count as okay? Was depression a normal breakup symptom? He hadn’t been to work in almost a month, so maybe he wasn’t okay. 

“I’m doing well, mother.”  _ Liar.  _ Well he certainly wasn’t going to give his father more ammunition. Mikoto squeezed his hand comfortingly with a warm wink.  _ I’m far from okay.  _ They ate in silence and Sasuke cheered internally for the absence of his father’s opinions. Shika’s lacking of motivation motivational saying popped in his head, ‘All good things are short lived’ _. Oh shut up.  _ Sasuke’s father had a habit of controlling people's lives, and getting someone comfortable before he attacked you when your guard was down. All things proven to work in his advantage.  _ Not today.  _

 

“I think it’d be a good if you started talking to Ino.” Fugaku spoke up. Sasuke glanced at him.  _ That blonde girl who had a unhealthy crush on me for years?  _ “Why?” 

Mikoto gripped her for until her knuckles turned white.  _ Bad sign.  _

Fugaku raised his hand suggestively, “Well, since you’re finally over your childish fun with that boy I think it’s time you finally settle down and continue the bloodline and take up the inheritance.” 

_ Short lived.  _ “I beg your pardon,  _ father?”  _

Fugaku registered the tone Sasuke had used and pressed on with a hint of challenge, “I let you have your fling with that good for nothing troublemaker. You are a man, Sasuke. You have no time to be playing around with that boy who will never go as far as you could if you got your head out of the clouds. The games are over and now that he is thankfully out of your life for good, which I congratulate you for doing finally, you can focus on better things. Ino is a smart girl and would be a good edition to the family and could help you realize your place.” 

 

_ Place?... place.  _ Sasuke knew his place. He’s known it ever since he came out. His father had disrespected him and Naruto far too many times now. Sasuke glared at the plate in front of him before speaking in a low growl, “My place, father? Teach me my place? No. I think it’s time  _ you _ learned  _ your _ place.” 

Fugaku leaned back, “Sasuke-“

Sasuke wouldn’t let him finish. “No. My feelings for Naruto were-are not childish games. I love him. I love that  _ man.  _ I lost the man I love because of people pushing as apart. I lost him because of you, not because I ‘came to my senses’.”

Fugaku crossed his arms and lowered his voice in a threat, “Watch your tone, Sasuke. You could regret what you do next.” 

 

Sasuke stood and slammed his fist on the table making the glass clank, “No! The only thing I regret and would is letting you affect Naruto and I anymore than you already have. You just had to control everything! Naruto was hurt because of you, and me being the coward for not standing up to you sooner. Now I’ve lost him and there is hell to pay for it. You are the devil, you are the reason he is suffering. And I let it happen. You have no control over our lives anymore, I disown you, Fugaku. I want nothing to do with you ever again. You leave a bad taste in my mouth. It’d do  _ you  _ some good to never talk about Naruto badly in front of me again because I won’t stand for it.”

 

Mikoto looked between them. Sasuke leaned over his father with rage and tears in his eyes. Fugaku’s expression was void of emotion. He stood and in one swift movement backhanded Sasuke. Hard. Sasuke’s head snapped to the side, he stared at the wall slowing his breathing.  _ Sorry old man. That’s not going to have the same effect on me anymore.  _ Sasuke slowly turned to glare a defiant determination into Fugaku’s gaze.  _ I’m not the scared pushover anymore.  _ Fugaku looked like he faltered before he raised his hand again.  _ I won’t let you hurt him anymore.  _ Fugaku swung again but Sasuke stopped his hand. “Enough!”

Fugaku’s gaze darkened and he tried to pull back but Sasuke held his arm with force. “I said,  _ enough.  _ Hitting me won’t do anything. It only makes you seem weaker, you are never going to hurt him or me again. I will see to that. He is mine. Mine to protect, and I will protect him from you. You’re lucky I don’t tell the cops about the shit you’ve put him through. Damn lucky. It was never a childish game. I knew what I wanted and what I was doing. I know how I feel about him. And don’t you ever dare suggest that I need correction for my feelings or that Naruto is worth nothing. If he will it, he could surpass me in anything I do, he is better equipped to succeed better than our entire family combined. So be very cautious how you speak of him. Around anyone.” 

Sasuke released his hand and turned to his mother who was crying, “Thank you for lunch, mother.  _ You _ are welcome to visit. I will be going now.” 

He took one last look at angry Fugaku before walking tall out of the room, down the hall and out the door.  _ Just make it to the car.  _ He shut the door to his car and let himself release everything he had been holding in. He started shaking as tears fell down his cheeks. Sasuke had held it together and stood up to the biggest bully in his life. Naruto’s bully. He had been terrified with every word he uttered and every second he was there but it had to be done and now that it was over Sasuke breathed easier.  _ I did it Naruto. The thing I had been terrified to do for so long, I did it. I freed us.   _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I haven’t shown what exactly went down with the three of them but I’m getting to it. 
> 
> Anyways love puppies and get rich!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short and I apologize

“I take it lunch went well?” Itachi asked looking at Sasuke over a cup of tea. Sasuke gave him a look, drooping the keys in the tray and sitting across from him. “You could say that. I couldn’t even get in the door without Fugaku saying something. Even mother was scolding him.”

 

“Fugaku?”

 

Sasuke looked up, “Oh. He told me I should settle down with Ino now that my ‘silly childish game’ was over, then proceeded to degrade Naruto. I stood up to him and he smacked me across the face. In short, I disowned him-“

 

“ _ Sasuke..  _ to disown father means to break ties between you and the family name along with any insurance that comes from it. Are you sure?” Itachi placed the cup down. Sasuke crossed his arms “I don’t want any association to him, I don’t care about the insurance as long as he doesn’t bother us again-“

 

Itachi cut him off again, “But, Sasuke, think of yours and Naruto’s well-being-“

 

Sasuke clenched his fist, “I am Itachi! Why do you think I disowned him? I don’t need the family money or it’s name. It’s only brought problems to me. If need be I’m sure Iruka and Kakashi would be willing to help, but I made my choice clear minded and consciously.”

 

Itachi took a long sip of tea, “Very well. If that is the choice you made and you are set in your decision then I will stand behind it.” Sasuke nodded and got up to get himself some tea, “Yeah.”  _ I don’t regret it. I never will.  _

 

Itachi poured himself more tea and scratched at his chipping nail polish, “I need new nail polish. I’ll be out for the evening, your welcome to join me. Might do you some good to get out some energy after today.”

 

Sasuke gulped the tea to get the taste of his lunch off his tongue, “Lunch wiped me out. I don’t know if I want to go out and see people. Might punch something.”

 

Itachi snorted and placed his cup in the sink, “Even more the reason to come out. I would get the enjoyment of seeing you fight and possibly lose.”

Sasuke glared, “I never lose.”

 

“To me you do.” Itachi raises his eyebrows and walked out of the kitchen. Sasuke clicked his tongue and followed him, “That was only once, and you cheated.”

 

“Sasuke, being better skilled isn’t cheating.” 

 

“Bullshit.”

 

They put their shoes on and stepped out the door. Itachi shrugged, “I’ll take a rematch. But I’ll warn you, I’m not as young as I used to be, I may be slower than usual.” He laughed at his modesty knowing full well he was better equipped to win than Sasuke. Sasuke bumped his shoulder as they walked down the hall, “Oh shut up. Where are we going anyways?”

 

Itachi wrapped his scarf around his neck and handed Sasuke a blue one. It had grown colder over the past week. “Coffee, book store, then a katana store. I want a new one for my class next week.” 

Sasuke took the scarf and wrapped it around neck. “Fun.” Itachi looked at him as they walked down the sidewalk with a grin, “Oh please, don’t sound so overjoyed. Your excitement is much too loud for me to handle. If there was many people around I might of had to pretend to not know you.”  _ Bastard.  _ “Hn.” 

 

Itachi laughed and pushed his shoulder. “Hurry up, Sasuke. The book store closes soon, I plan to grab a new book then read it over tea.”

 

“Why, I would never dream of walking slowly at an enjoyable pace just so you can get another pile of dead tree with ink all over it.”

 

“How thoughtful, now let’s go before I am forced to make you sleep outside.”

 

“Hn.”

 

“That’s the spirit.” 

 

“Shut up.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short burst then big blow out

“So. Have you done something with that  _ thing  _ we talked about earlier?” 

 

Sasuke looked up from the book he had bought that was definitely not influenced by Itachi ‘accidentally’ dropping into his hands. “Which one?” 

Itachi placed his copy of the same book down, already through half of it in the hour they’ve been sitting in the coffee shop. “ _ Which one,  _ Sasuke the big one that you didn’t exactly have an easy time realizing would never happen.” 

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and pulled the book up so it blocked out his brother that he knew was giving a amused look from his childish action. That  _ thing  _ was definitely not on any list of things he was okay discussing. It was painful to remember and remotely look at anything pertaining to it. So no, he has done nothing. Itachi cleared his throat and Sasuke put the book down, leaning on his hand. He raised an eyebrow, “No. It’s also going to stay that way, we both know that.”

Itachi turned his page, using his index as a bookmark. “Mmmm. I suppose if that’s how you wish it to stay. How has the apartment searches going?” 

 

Sasuke closed the book, not caring to save his page. “I can’t find anything good, my boss won’t let me transfer. I’m just going to say forget it and not move at all. Maybe something around here will pop up.” He looked out the large windows of the shop at the downtown. Each attempt to view a house anywhere out of state proved useless and his boss just wouldn’t let him transfer. So looks like he is stuck here.  _ Amazing.  _ Sasuke rolled his eyes. Luck in these matters were not on his side it seemed. The  _ thing  _ trickled back into his mind once again. Taking purchase on his serene state.  _ Tricky bastard.  _ It had been hard to swallow, knowing said  _ thing  _ would indefinitely never happen. Those sorts of events were quite ruined for him now.  _ Hadn’t planned on doing it before him anyways. What difference is it now?  _ The difference was Naruto. He was the change. The only good change in his life, even now he is changing him. 

Sasuke picked up the book only to put it down again. Itachi raised an eyebrow not taking his eyes off his own. “Do you think…” the question was lost as he spoke it. What even was he asking? What was he looking for? 

 

Itachi placed the book down for good this time. “What?”

_ What. _ Exactly. Sasuke breathe out slowly. His brow drawn close in concentration as his mind pieced together what he wanted. “Would he still take me back?” It wasn’t exactly what he wanted to say, certainly not all of it. But it would do. That being the basis of his thoughts. 

Itachi sighed, moving the book to the side replacing the spot with his clasped hands. “Now? No. Not at all. He may possibly have feelings for you still, but you left him scorned. Sasuke, you need to build that relationship back up with him. If you really want him back. You will need to work very hard. An apology won’t due. Not this time.” 

His brow drew in more. He knew that. It’s not like all those other times. Sasuke had crossed a line he never wanted to. This time was different. For both of them.  _ I want him back.  _ Useless to want everything back to normal. What good would it do to be stuck in that old situation?  _ I need him back.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes short. But short is leading to big don’t worry.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well deserved long chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING:
> 
> There are homophobic commentary in here as well as blood and abuse. And assault but not sexual. There is foul language and suggestion of assault but never intention of it. Just so everyone is warned. You can skip this if it is a sensitive topic, it won’t cause issues with the storyline if you don’t read it.

Naruto laid in his bed once again. Letting it swallow him up. Sleep coming to hold him again. The food had been pleasant, Naruto couldn’t help himself but want more. Kakashi was always an amazing cook. Iruka too. Naruto turned on his side, resting his hand next to his cheek. Blankly watching the city. The traffic light flashing just under his window sill.  _ Green.  _ Naruto blinked slowly.  _ Yellow.  _ It was dark and he was tired.  _ Red.  _ He always felt tired.  _ Green.  _ So maybe he was just feeling normal. Was tired his normal now? He couldn’t tell. Well no. He hadn’t the energy to tell.  _ Yellow.  _ Naruto chewed on his finger nail.  _ Red.  _ How had it all gone wrong? What did he do for Sasuke to leave?  _ Green.  _ Naruto never cheated. Never made Sasuke feel bad. Never used him.  _ Yellow.  _ Stole from him. Abused him. Never was rude to his family no matter how horrible they were to him. Iruka had raised him better than that. Naruto couldn’t figure it out. Well no.  _ Red. _ He hadn’t the energy to force himself to figure it out. His mind just did it on its own. Quite suddenly too. One moment Naruto would be drifting into to yet again another nap and his mind would show something traumatic they had gone through and Naruto found he couldn’t sleep anymore. 

 

Yeah. Tired was his normal now…

  
  


Horribly. These were one of those moments. Naruto turned away from the window and pulled the blankets up to his chin. Frowning hard. He willed the memories to go away. But like always. Naruto had no energy for that either. 

  
  


_ Naruto stepped into his work beaming with happiness. He loved working here, even if they gave him crazy hours and Sasuke complained they never got to have ‘special time’ anymore, Naruto couldn’t get enough it was his dream job. I mean who else would get the opportunity to teach young kids how to surf. It was a pretty far drive away from their place but spending almost all day at the beach was worth the drive.  _

_ Naruto put his duffle into his locker and put the lifeguard whistle on. Shiny orange. A gift from Sakura when he was promoted as head instructor. Naruto walked out to the back deck and grabbed his board, already in his wetsuit. He looked out at the large waves crashing down on the beach shore. Today was going to be amazing.  _

  
  


Naruto scowled. So he had thought. The memory was one of many he had grown to not care for. But apparently his mind had a particular liking for it. Seems how it was brought up at the worst times. 

 

_ His students lined up with their boards shaking with excitement. Naruto mirrored them as he tried to not rush his speech of safety. He knew it was very important for them to know but everyone was itching to get in the water. Finally Naruto finished and they raced down to the water and began their lesson.  _

  
  


Naruto closed his eyes and squeezed them. Knowing what part came next. 

 

_ His towel was put back in his locker after he had dried most of his hair. It was an amazing day, as always. Now Naruto couldn’t wait to get home and tell Sasuke all about it and the new tricks his students learned. He pulled his duffle out and walked out the building. Locking up. Naruto hummed and strolled to his car absolutely on cloud nine from today. The weather was perfectly warm, cool breeze. Beautiful sunset. It was an amazing day. Naruto turned the sidewalk to the parking lot he always parked his car and slowed down. A frown forming on his face. Three men stood around his car. Hands in pockets. Posture unfriendly. Naruto stood up taller as he got closer, “Uh hey, this is my car and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t lounge on it.” _

_ One of the guys with black hair leaned back and patted the mirror. “Pretty nice car, for a low life like you.” _

 

_ Naruto crossed his arms. “Excuse you? You don’t know anything about me.” _

_ Another guy stepped towards Naruto. His hair was red. “Actually. We do. And it’s why we are here.” _

_ The third guy stood behind Naruto. “You see. We aren’t very fond of your kind. It’s not normal and we don’t like that.” _

_ Naruto watched them warily. “And what is my kind?” _

 

_ The man with black hair tilted his head. “Fags.” _

 

_ Naruto tensed and the group broke into laughter. The air was starting to feel crowded and unsettling.  _

_ The man with red hair circled Naruto, “Your kind is disgusting. Filthy. What kind of man would bend down and spread his legs for another?” _

 

_ The man who had been behind Naruto leered. “A disgusting worthless one.” _

 

_ Naruto stepped towards his car only to be blocked by the man with red hair. They all looked Naruto’s age. Each around his height and the same build. But three against one was not an easy fight to win. The man with red hair grinned. Tauntingly. “Where are you running off to? Going home to your boyfriend so he can push you into a mattress and make you feel like a real man. Do you like having something shoved up your-“ _

_ Naruto shouldered past him and got in his car. He turned it on and put the gear in reverse. The group of men laughed. The closed car making it sound far off.  _

 

_ “Look. He’s upset.” _

_ “ Fag probably loves it.” _

_ “He begs for it I bet.”  _

 

_ Naruto gripped the steering wheel hard and started to back the car up. The guys waved him off as he drove away. “See you again soon!”  _

 

He turned to the other side. Trying to distract his brain but nothing was working. Naruto frowned, biting his bottom lip. He never did anything to deserve this but exist. Naruto had merely existed and it was enough to cause problems. It was unfair. In so many ways. 

 

_ Naruto parked the car and unhinged his hands from where they had been gripping the steering wheel for an hour. The outlines of the stitching on his palms. He inhaled slowly and got out. Putting on a smile, trying to push aside his confrontation. Sasuke had already been home for an hour so Naruto knew he would be engulfed in love as soon as he stepped in the house.  _

 

_ Naruto closed the door behind him and dropped the duffle down, leaving his shoes there too. “Naruto! Is that you?” _

_ “Yeah it’s me.” _

_ He walked down the hallway into the kitchen were Sasuke was bent over the pot in front of him. Naruto stood behind him inhaling the delicious smell. Sasuke looked over his shoulder and smiled, “I missed you.”  _

_ Naruto rolled his eyes. “You always miss me when I’m not the one waiting at home for your never preannounced arrival.”  _

_ Sasuke raised an eyebrow and dropped the vegetables he had been cutting up, into the pan. “You’re lucky you are cute.”  _

_ He pressed his lips to Naruto.  _

 

_ ‘Fags.’ _

 

_ Naruto pulled away quickly when the guys words echoed in his head. Sasuke frowned but continued cooking, “How was work?” _

_ Naruto walked to the fridge to get a drink. “Amazing! The kids learned a new trick and we spent all day in the water. Best type of day too. Beautiful waves. Warm weather. Not too hot and not super cold.” _

 

_ Sasuke hummed. “I hate the heat.” _

 

_ Naruto scoffed. “You’re just a heartless vampire who loves living like an icicle and insisting I do the same while you put the a/c on high.” He turned the heat up in the house from where Sasuke had set it.  _

 

_ His boyfriend laughed, “If I am a heartless vampire then how come I fell in love with the sun?” _

 

_ Naruto blushed wildly and looked away. “Sasuke, you’re so cheesy, Stop.”  _

 

_ The black haired boy only shrugged.  _

 

Maybe if he thought of Sasuke doing something else it would distract him. Naruto closed his eyes and concentrated everything he had in stock to change his mind around. Moments past but nothing worked. Slowly his mind went blank and he sighed. Relief. Naruto turned back to the window and closed his eyes.  _ I’ll get some sleep now.  _ Slowly. Slowly he was slipping away. 

  
  


_ The men were back. For the past three weeks they’d been at his car after his shift and it was starting to get old.  _

 

Naruto groaned. He was so close. 

 

_ He held the strap of his bag and walked by the men. They said their usual comments that he had grown used to tuning out and walked to the driver side.  _

 

_ “Hey! Are you ignoring us?” _

 

_ Naruto raised his eyebrows, “Does it look like I’m doing anything else?” _

 

_ He unlocked his car.  _

 

_ “Don’t get smart with us.” _

 

_ “I’ve had enough of his mouth.” _

 

_ “Me too.” _

 

_ Naruto stumbled forward into his car when someone pushed him from behind. He turned around only to be pushed back again by the man with red hair. Naruto stepped forward, angry now. The man who had pushed him laughed, “Now we are getting somewhere. Come on pretty boy, do something.” _

_ They pushed Naruto again and he took another step towards them, fists clenched.  _

 

_ “I think he’s upset.” _

 

_ “Want us to fuck it out of you?” _

 

_ Naruto stopped and stared at them in shock. They all burst out into loud barking laughs. “Did you see his face?” _

_ “He looked so surprised!” _

 

_ “I think he’s disappointed now.” _

 

_ Naruto glared and turned back to his car. Completely done with this. He just wanted to get home and see Sasuke. So he could feel safe.  _

_ Once again he was pushed. Naruto whipped around and a fist connected with him. He stumbled back and another hit his stomach. Naruto gasped and curled over, holding himsef. The group cheered and proceeded to beat on Naruto until he was bleeding on the parking lot.  _

_ He coughed out blood from his mouth as the assault stopped.  _

 

_ “That will teach you.” _

 

_ “That’s what fags get.” _

 

_ They walked away and Naruto laid there for awhile. Until his head stopped pounding and then he stood. Naruto wipes his nose then his eyes that were wet with tears. He got in his car and put the car in gear with a shaky hand. It was getting really old.  _

  
  


A tear fell from his eye at the memory. It still hurt. Naruto hadn't been beaten up like that since middle school. He hated this memory. Naruto cursed his mind for bringing it back. 

 

_ Naruto parked the car like he always did and walked up to the front door. He couldn’t just show himself like this to Sasuke. Nothing about what has been happening had been told to his boyfriend and he didn’t plan on it. If it continued Naruto would call the authorities or something. Sasuke had enough issues with his family as it is, Naruto wouldn’t risk him getting involved with this. Not after today.  _

_ He closed the door behind him, dropping his duffle and leaving his shoes. Naruto turned to walk up the stairs when arms wrapped around his waist. He winced at the still tender bruises.  _

_ “I’m glad you’re home. I missed you.” _

 

_ Naruto scoffed. “You always miss me when I’m not the one awaiting your arrival.” He wanted to be left alone to lick his wounds and cover it up before he saw Sasuke. But it was going to be hard to escape him now.  _

 

_ His boyfriend leaned his face to his neck and sighed. “Work was rough today. A miscommunication with our lower employees almost cost me overtime today. But I straightened it out.” _

_ Naruto nodded. “That’s good. I wouldn’t want you overworking yourself.” _

_ Sasuke humed again and kissed his shoulder. Naruto bit the inside of his cheek. He didn’t want Sasuke to see him.  _

_ “How was work?” _

 

_ Naruto tensed. It was involuntary but it didn’t go unnoticed. Sasuke leaned away from his neck, tightening his grip to try and assure Naruto. It only caused more pain. “What happened at work?” _

 

_ Naruto shook his head, “Nothing. Today was good-amazing! The students listened well and we spent all day at the beach. A perfect day.” _

 

_ Sasuke leaned back, “Naruto...”  _

 

_ Naruto was beginning to feel panic. “Warm weather and everything!” _

 

_ Sasuke unwrapped his arms and moved Naruto to face him. He kept his head down and pressed his forehead to his boyfriends chest. Sasuke tried to lift his face up but Naruto held his head down. “Naruto, what are you doing? Look at me.” _

 

_ Naruto nuzzled his face to his chest and wrapped his arms around Sasuke’s waist ignoring the ache. “I just want to hug you.” _

 

_ Sasuke lowered his voice in a warning. “Naruto..” _

 

_ “I’m just-“ _

 

_ “Look at me.” _

 

_ “Why can't I hug you?-“ _

 

_ “Naruto, look at me now.” _

 

_ “I just want to hug you-“ _

 

_ Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s face and lifted it up. Naruto stared into Sasuke’s eyes as they widened. Changing from impatient to shock to anger, sadness, and finally resting on concern.”What happened at work?” _

 

_ Naruto tried to pull his face away but Sasuke held him in place. Staring into his eyes. Naruto closed them instead. “N-nothing. The waves were just really rough and I wiped out hard.” _

 

_ “So hard you have a black eye, bloody nose, and a busted lip?” _

 

_ Naruto nodded. He heard Sasuke sigh. Naruto couldn’t open his eyes and face him.  _

 

_ “I don’t believe you.” _

 

_ Naruto frowned. “It’s not that bad, Sasuke. Really.” _

 

_ “Are you joking, or are you being serious? I’d like to hope you’re joking about this because baby you look busted up.” _

 

_ Naruto pouted. “Rude.” _

 

_ He felt lips touch his and Naruto melted into the comforting touch of Sasuke. He felt safe. Secure. Naruto figured he was acting pretty desperate and clingy because Sasuke frowned into the kiss before pulling back and leading him upstairs to clean his wounds.  _

  
  


He shouldn’t have believed Naruto. Not even the three times later it happened and he came home with a bloody knuckle from finally fighting back. It was the worst mistake he had made in that situation. Naruto would admit that. In all reality Naruto should have confided in his boyfriend about the issues he was dealing with just as Sasuke should have. But they didn’t. And look where they are now. Naruto had three identical slashes on each cheek from fighting back that one time and never telling Sasuke until it was too late, and Sasuke is gone. Perfect reward for a perfect idiot. Naruto was raised right. He’d never wish anything on Sasuke’s father or family, never say rude things to their face, or bash them as people. But sometimes Naruto wished Sasuke would have just left his family behind if he hated them so much. If they hated them so much. A selfish thought. Naruto understood it was family. But Naruto would have felt so much better if it had happened. Although now is not the time to dwell on such things. His brain had finally stopped and sleep was back to rescue him. 

Naruto closed his eyes and was washed away into his only realm of peace once again. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little does Nar know. Sasuke did. We are getting close to the end and it’s going to be an amazing last few chapters.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been really behind the curve for updating. I’m sorry guys but I’m working on it

Itachi wasn’t one to press his nose into business that did not concern him. He believed personal matters were to be solved in quiet. Itachi never liked being dragged into others affairs, but unfortunately. These matters he couldn’t ignore. 

 

“Sasuke. If you’re going to go out, take your scarf with you it’s cold.” 

 

Sasuke opened the front door, “Yeah yeah, alright mom.” 

 

Itachi laughed lightly and bit into his sandwich. It was lunch and Sasuke was going out for his usual walk around town. Sasuke said he only went to the bar and then home but Itachi wasn’t a fool, he knew his little brother visited the one place he could remember Naruto in peace. The origin of them, the old rundown playground from their childhood. Itachi would never say he knew where he went, it wouldn't do any good. He simply told him to have a good time, be safe, wear a scarf and wait for him to come back. Each time Sasuke felt a little better, more at ease. He wondered if his little brother would talk to the park, ask it questions, accuse it for bringing those two together. Itachi didn’t want to know, those were personal matters. 

“I’ll be back later, don’t wait up on me for supper.” Then he closed the door and Itachi continued his own life. Taking out his Katana and worked on his technique. 

—

Sasuke walked by the chain link fence that bordered the old playground. He had visited it far too many times since leaving Naruto. Sasuke knew he should do something else to mend his wounds, but today would not be that day. 

 

He opened the gate and stepped through. Crunching over orange dead leaves, hands in pockets. Sasuke sat in his usual spot on the cold wooden bench, hunching forward to keep warm. Wind rustled the trees, moving the swings in a familiar creak. Sasuke sighed,  _ what am I even doing here? _ He didn’t know but it felt right on that bench, staring at the rickety playground he used to play on. Maybe it would show him what to do, it had shown him once before. 

  
  


Sasuke blew out an annoyed grunt. His breath coming out in a white cloud, it was almost winter. Summer had gone by fast, he missed the sun. His bed had gotten cold. 

 

Sasuke shivered.  _ It’s too cold to sit out here _ . Yet he made no move to get up, he couldn’t. This place held him, it was where everything began. Sasuke and Naruto became friends here. Fell in love on those swings. He kissed Naruto on the playground for the first time under the stars. Told him he loved that blond idiot on this very bench.

 

Sasuke let himself get lost in his memories. He remembered those gorgeous brilliant blue eyes, and that absolutely heart melting smile. His shock of unruly golden hair, and his confident personality. The way he made Sasuke feel like he was on top of the world, like no matter what they would be alright. How much love that man pulled out of him, and filled him up with. Sasuke wiped his eyes, he ruined everything. He wanted to change it all. Turn it back. Maybe it was too late. He didn’t know.

 

—

 

“Alright, niño. Get up it’s time to get out of that bed  and be a part of this world.” 

The blankets were pulled off of Naruto in one swift tug. He curled up, feeling cold.  _ “ _ Ugh.”

Iruka dropped the blankets on the floor and stood next to his curled up son. He pressed his fists on his hips, and looked him over tisking in disapproval. “You have not showered in who knows how long, and your room needs cleaning. Now get up! I won’t ask again, Naruto.”

 

Naruto rolled over and glared up at him, not exactly fond of early mornings. He contemplated complaining but the look on Iruka’s face made him keep his mouth closed. 

Naruto got up, scratched his chest and yawned. The abrupt change to his usual morning routine was appreciated but Naruto wouldn’t say it, at least not yet. 

 

 

A change of clothes were already waiting for him in the shower, Naruto smiled at them. Iruka always took care of him and over prepared.  _ Same old Iruka.  _ He looked at his reflection. Greasy hair, bags under his eyes, expressionless face. Naruto didn’t like this version, it wasn’t him. The dial on the shower was turned to hot, standing under the spray letting it ease his tense muscles. Hot water melting his aches away. Naruto washed his body, his hair, then his face. Mindlessly thinking about Sasuke. They always took showers together, wasting water doing anything but wash up. He grinned, laughing short. Yeah showering was fun. Naruto ran his soapy fingers over his identical scars on each cheek, washing away the material he used to cover them up. Feeling them grow prominent with every scrub. They didn’t look horrible on his face, the scars were clean. Sasuke had even said they made him even more beautiful, but Naruto didn’t like them. He’d have to grow to, Naruto knew that. Although, right now he didn’t need to. Not yet. 

He shut the water off and stepped out. Grabbing the towel that hung from the door rack and dried off. Naruto rustled the towel over his hair before pulling his shirt on. He agreed with Iruka to only wear Sasuke’s shirt to bed, a healing tactic or something. Although, Iruka had grabbed another shirt of Sasuke’s Naruto kept with him. He smiled again at the irony.  _ I just can’t escape you.  _

 

His reflection hadn’t changed after the shower, although he was cleaner. Naruto opened the medicine cabinet and pulled out his scar cover up, tossing the lid to the side of the counter and scooping some onto his index. He closed the cabinet and turned his face to the side, getting a better view of the scars. Naruto brought his hand up when the door opened and Iruka leaning his head in. 

 

“Naruto, I’m sorry to barge in but we have breakfast ready and I wanted to know if you are-“ 

 

Iruka stopped talking. All attention on Naruto and the jar on the counter. Naruto held his breath, expecting his dad to freak out at seeing his scars, but there was no panic in his brown eyes. They softened. Iruka crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe, “I think there are things that need to be shared between you, your father, and I. Come down for breakfast.” 

 

Naruto nodded, still holding his breath. Iruka smiled and closed the door slowly. He breathed out shakily and brought his hand to cover his face. Naruto didn’t understand why he got so anxious from Iruka seeing the scars. He washed his hands, seeing no need to cover them anymore. Now it was time to explain what had happened. Naruto wasn’t ready. 

  
  


He turned the corner of his hallway, entering the kitchen. As Iruka had said, breakfast was spread out across the table. Naruto’s stomach grumbled, Iruka made ramen. 

 

“Are you hungry?”

 

Naruto nodded in answer to Kakashi. He really was. Kakashi handed him a bowl and motioned to the food, “Dig in, kid. I’ll get Iruka, and we will join.” Naruto looked to Kakashi, expecting to see him fixated on the scars. But he wasn’t. His eyes stayed on Naruto’s, never breaking contact. Naruto appreciated that. Taking the bowl, he filled it up with everything on the table. 

 

Iruka came out following Kakashi, smiling warmly. “Ah, so you were hungry!” 

Naruto nodded, his mouth already stuffed. 

Iruka beamed at Kakashi and took his seat across from Naruto, Kakashi sat next to him. They ate in silence, it was comfortable. 

 

Iruka took their bowls away and sat at the table again. Hands clasped together and head tilted. Naruto knew that body language, they would be having a family meeting. Kakashi recognized it too and leaned back, eyebrows raised. 

 

Silence passed over them for awhile before Iruka spoke. 

 

“Naruto. What happened?”

 

Naruto flinched slightly, but it wasn’t unnoticeable. Explaining was hard to do when he wasn’t entirely okay with even thinking about it. How does he even explain that day? Iruka watched him patiently, eyes studying him. Naruto twisted his hands together nervously. “Uhh… it was um…” 

 

Kakashi leaned forward, “Naruto. We understand it will be hard to speak up about what happened, but you need to. It’s better to tell us, who can help you move on rather than keep it inside and let it torment you. So take your time.”

 

Naruto nodded. He took a moment to compose what he wanted to say. “It was a normal work day. I woke up to coffee being made and my lunch packed. The sun was shining like it always did during the beginning of summer. Sasuke woke me up to ramen and kissed me goodbye before leaving for work. It was normal to  _ him _ I guess.” Once he started, Naruto couldn’t stop. “He knew about the guys harassing me when I came home messed up after a fight with them. Well, you can’t call it a fight. I didn’t  _ fight  _ back. I couldn’t, I didn’t know what to do. The things they said were true. But anyways. They got worse overtime when I wouldn’t react to their taunts. I kept it from Sasuke, only telling him small details of our encounters. He wanted to go to the police but I said no. I didn’t want them knowing who Sasuke was, but something told me they already did. That’s what really scared me, that they knew him and are hurting me to get to him. So if he didn’t know, then they wouldn’t win... That day would have been the same as the others; they’d say demeaning horrible shit and maybe push me around if they felt like it. I come home feeling like crap and bloody. Sasuke would worry and demand to know who they were, and I’d make it not seem as bad. I don’t know when I got amazing lying skills but I convince Sasuke every time. Or he just trusted me that much.” 

 

Iruka opened his mouth to speak, but Kakashi placed his hand on his shoulder, silencing him. Iruka shut his mouth and let Naruto continue.

 

Naruto looked at the table. “After work, I walked back to the same parking spot I had parked in since working there. Maybe I should have notified management or moved my car and maybe even my hours but I- I don’t know why I didn’t. They did their usual insult bit, by that time I was immune to their words, knowing as soon as I saw Sasuke I’d feel better. I stood still as they used me as a punching bag, thinking over and over that it was for Sasuke. That me taking this beating would somehow protect Sasuke. I still believe it, stupid. They stopped and I got up off the ground, dripping blood on my fifth work shirt I had to replace. I went to open my door when a car pulled up behind me, I don’t know how but I knew exactly who it was. I remember praying that when I turned around I would not see the black Mercedes behind my car with the one person I didn’t want to be there in it. But my wishes meant nothing I guess… I turned and watched Sasuke stepped out of that car and stare at them with so much anger I took a step back. I was scared, scared he’d be upset with me but he wasn’t. The guys smiled at him and greeted Sasuke, I had been right about them knowing him. Apparently they were old friends.” 

 

Naruto closed his eyes. “Sasuke was pissed. He was terrifying. When he looked at me I saw him break, and so did I. I started crying, I couldn’t control it. The men saw and started laughing saying I needed my boyfriend to come and protect me because I wasn’t a man and…  _ some other  _ things. That’s when Sasuke snapped. He lunged at them and it was a mess of bodies an fists flying. I couldn’t tell which blood was from who… I-I was sitting against my car, crying and completely useless. One of the guys came up to me and pulled a knife. He dragged me up and held it to my throat. Everything stopped. Sasuke was breathing heavy, bleeding from his nose. He looked nervous, it made me scared. I could have died. The guy laughed and pressed it harder into my throat. He said what we felt and were doing was wrong and we should die. I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to see Sasuke’s face when I died. Sasuke threatened them and I don’t know what happened but all of a sudden I was- I was on the ground being held down while having my face carved. I screamed and cried for Sasuke but he was being held back too. He was yelling, his eyes were different. The man cutting me said the slices were so I’d always remember them and how disgusting I am. When he finished, the guys holding Sasuke kicked his stomach and he fell. Then they were gone. We must have laid there forever…... I was shaking. Staring at the ground. Sasuke dropped next to me, tears making paths down his bloody face. I remember him apologizing and crying. I couldn’t really hear him, the doctors said I was in shock. I made Sasuke promise to not tell the police what happened. I felt so weak for not saying anything sooner, so stupid. He was hesitant but Sasuke did what I asked. I think I broke him a little when I made him lie... The cuts weren’t deep enough to cause nerve damage otherwise I wouldn’t of been able to smile again. When I got back from the hospital I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror without crying, I knew Sasuke was affected by them too but he faked it for me. After that day he was just.. different. Something changed when he was helpless to save me. That’s when he started distancing himself and me from friends and family. I quit my job and he transferred to a higher paying more hours job. I barely left the house, it’s not that he stopped me, I just didn’t want to go out either. He bought me scar concealer to make me feel better, and I covered them up. None of our friends know, only you both. I just…. I’m so weak. I couldn’t even help myself and I changed him.” 

Naruto squeezed his eyes as tears slipped out. “I drove him away. I did this to myself!” He pointed to his face. Glaring at his parents. 

 

Iruka bit his lip, tears filling his own eyes. Kakashi wrapped his arm around him. “You were not weak. You  _ are  _ not weak. Not doing anything was… smart. In a sense. If it was in work or anything like that, then yes, fighting back would make the situation worse. But you were outside of work, maybe you should of fought back but I understand not being able to.”

 

Iruka nodded. “I wouldn’t have. If I thought it would protect Kakashi, I would have taken it too. But that’s not how it works. You both were in a relationship, that means you tell them everything.  _ Even  _ if that means they could get hurt too. If you had told Sasuke everything he might of helped you, and if you told us? Your father would of had no problem dealing with it.” 

 

Naruto clenched his jaw to stop himself from sobbing. He knew all this. 

 

Iruka wiped his eyes. “But we didn’t want to talk to scold you or remind you of the mistakes and missed chances. We are talking to find a solution. Thank you for telling us and I’m so proud that you did. I can see it’s hard. Now we can help you figure out your feelings and move on. Okay?”

 

Naruto nodded, inhaling sharply and looking away. He was on the verge of breaking down. Iruka got up and pulled Naruto to his chest and he crashed. Naruto squeezed him and sobbed hard. “I-I hated f-feeling weak. Iru-Iruka I’m s-sorry I d-didn’t tell y-you.” He took fist fulls of Iruka shirt and hyperventilated. 

 

Iruka was crying too. “It’s okay, Niño. It’s okay, I forgive you, I wasn’t even upset. I was only worried. Shh shh, we are here now.” Iruka rubbed Naruto’s back, tears falling down his face. Kakashi knelt on the floor and hugged them both. “I’m proud you wanted to handle it on your own, but certain things you cannot do alone. I hope you learned from this, and will handle things different.” 

 

Naruto gasped unevenly and nodded. Iruka held Naruto’s face I his hands, thumb wiping away the tears. “You did not drive him away. Sasuke loved you too much to be foolish enough and leave just because of that. He wanted to protect you from them, just as you had. Although it does seem it may have been taken a step too far.”

 

Naruto’s brow furrowed. “W-What?”

 

Kakashi and Iruka shared a glance before he continued. “Naruto… Sasuke left you because he thought his leaving would give you a better life. One without constant pain and harassment, a life that you wouldn’t be afraid to live. He thought leaving would be the only way to truly protect you, Sasuke left because he loved you. No matter how horrible and cruel it may seem and feel, it makes sense. He was just… misguided in his attempts.” 

 

_ He left me broken because he wanted to protect me? Sasuke hurt me because he loved me?  _ Naruto shook.  _ Did he really think that was the way to help me?  _ He stood abruptly. “If it’s okay, I’d like to go in my room again.” 

 

Iruka nodded. “Of course. We will call you for lunch.” 

 

Naruto didn’t answer as he walked back up the stairs. He closed the door softly despite his hands shaking. It was an unreasonable action.  _ That idiot. We were doing so good.  _ They had been doing better than before after Naruto was released from the hospital. The harassment stopped and Sasuke’s family didn’t call anymore. Naruto felt as though he could breathe easier, but Sasuke’s obsession with safety kept him on edge constantly. Naruto kicked the box away from his bed and sat on the edge.  _ Bastard.  _ Anger boiled up, it overflowed with irritation.  _ He didn’t even tell me what he was feeling.  _ Naruto really had no room to complain, he had kept things from Sasuke as well. But at least he never left him because of it. Naruto stayed, through and through. He never once thought about running, hiding from the problem. Naruto faced it head on without a single complaint.  _ I can’t stand him sometimes.  _ Naruto stood. He needed to walk. 

 

Naruto dressed into a jacket and walked down the stairs, pulling his shoes on. “I’m going out. I’ll be back later.” 

 

Iruka looked shocked but only nodded. Knowing that his son needed to be out after over a month or more of being held up in this house. “Be safe.” 

 

“I will.” He closed the door. 

 

Naruto walked. Battling in his head, and walked some more. Felt like crying, then continued walking until his feet began to hurt and his legs were wobbly. He had walked all the way down to an old part of his childhood. Naruto hadn’t noticed where he was until that familiar creaking of a swing set made him snap his head up, facing the old playground where he used to play. Naruto smiled.  _ Hello old friend.  _ Many things had happened in that very place, memories, regrets, dreams. They all started there, but never ended. That structure was the place Naruto realized many important things, among those were that Sasuke was a real good kisser and he’d never love anyone the way he loved Sasuke. 

Naruto rubbed his face, tired and needing to sit down. He opened the gate and walked in, turning to sit at a bench when he stopped. Breath hitching.  _ Sasuke.  _


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I double updated so make sure you read the previous.

Naruto could have thrown up if the feeling of crying wasn’t too strong. Sasuke was sitting on the bench they had vowed to love each other forever, looking just as good if not better than he had when he left. Naruto clenched his fists. He should hit him, yell and scream. Curse his name. But… all Naruto wanted to do was be held. Told everything would be alright. Even if it was a lie, he just wanted it to come from that man. 

 

His feet moved before he could process and Naruto sat next to Sasuke, he tensed but did not look at him. They stared at the playground for awhile. 

 

Naruto grinned slightly. “I remember that time when we were like 6. I wanted to go down the slide first but you were in the way so I tried to push you to the side, and then you pushed me down it instead.” He chuckled. “Scraped my elbow and cried like a baby.” 

 

“Then I gave you my snack after because I felt bad.” Sasuke’s face showed no emotion. 

Naruto looked at him, “You always sucked at apologizes.”

 

Sasuke looked at his hands, frowning hard. “I meant everything I said, Naruto. I left to keep you safe.”

He looked away from him. Not speaking. The sound of wind filled the air. After what seemed like a century Naruto spoke, “How have you been?”

 

Sasuke released his hands. “Terrible. Guilt has been eating at me ever since I left you…. I’ve been staying at Itachi’s but I guess you already know that much. He’s been helping me look for a new job, but nothings been sticking. A um… a few weeks after everything, my parents invited me over for lunch.”

 

Naruto didn’t look at him, voice guarded. “Did you go?”

 

Sasuke nodded. “Yeah, I went. I wasn’t going to but, Itachi convinced me. I’m kinda glad he did because I finally stood up to Fugaku….He made a few comments I couldn’t bare to hear anymore. The blows at me were manageable but you were still a sensitive topic… so I stood up to him, defended you and disowned him. I told him if he ever said anything bad or even thought about hurting you again I’d throw him in jail myself and he’d regret it. Then I left.”

 

Naruto didn’t do anything. His face blank. Sasuke had disowned his own father for Naruto.  _ He did that for me. But… does that mean he still loves me?  _ Naruto looked at Sasuke through the corner of his eye. The bags under his eyes looked out of place, but Naruto guessed he didn’t look any better. 

 

Sasuke looked at him, eyes roving over his face. “You stopped wearing the concealer.”

 

Naruto brought his hand up to cover the scars. “Yeah, Iruka saw them so I kinda had no real need to hide anymore.”

Sasuke looked at the ground. “You still are beautiful.” 

 

Naruto’s eyes softened. 

 

Sasuke spoke again. “I-I really did want to go back. I wish I had never left you. Nobody told me how you were doing, I’d ask but they just said they wouldn’t tell. I couldn’t sleep for the first few weeks I was away. And I know I shouldn’t be acting like this but I’m so sorry for what I did.” Sasuke raised his head. Eyes brimming with tears. “I know I did it out of fear because I was a scared bastard that was afraid to stand up to my issues with you. Too afraid that if you saw how weak I actually was you’d- you’d leave me.”

 

Naruto stared. 

 

“All of that was so weak of me to do. I left you crying in  _ our  _ home. When I should have stayed and loved you.” Sasuke wiped the tears falling. “I should have been the man you needed! Instead I was worse than the people who hurt you.” 

 

Sasuke inhaled shakily, his eyes boring holes into Naruto’s own. “I don’t expect you to forgive me but I can’t live with knowing I did that. I can’t go on without knowing how you are. Tell me you hate me, I deserve it. Tell me how amazing you’ve been doing without me. Tell me you don’t love me anymore and I’m a monster. Please Naruto! Tell me!”

 

Naruto shook his head. Tears running down his face. How could he lie? Naruto shook his head again, biting his lip.  _ I can’t Sasuke.  _ “I’m sorry. Sasuke, I….” he couldn’t get the words out. He didn’t know how.  _ This is wrong. He hurt me.  _ “Sasuke…”  _ He left me a mess.  _ Naruto stared into his glossed dark eyes, remembering how mesmerizing they were.  _ But I love you.  _ “I can’t. I can’t say those things because I wouldn’t mean it.” 

 

Sasuke’s eyes turned more anguished. Naruto’s lip trembled. Sasuke leaned in and Naruto froze.  _ No. No you can’t.  _ He held his hand against Sasuke’s chest, “Stop.” 

Sasuke sat back, “I’m sorry, Naruto. I didn’t mean to pus-“

 

“For over a month. I didn’t eat anything, I didn’t speak, smile, laugh, leave our home. A month Sasuke. Now you come out and say you’re sorry?” Naruto couldn’t stop the pain he felt.

 

Sasuke shoved his hands in his pocket and went to speak but Naruto cut him off. “No. Now you listen to me, you killed me that day and I’ve been dead inside ever since. I needed you Sasuke. I still need you. Yet you never came, if you had I would have welcome you back. Now I’m not so sure. I warned what you’d do to me if you left but yet you still did. And you APOLOGIZE!?” 

 

Sasuke flinched. 

 

Naruto raised his hands, shaking with rage. “I should hate you! I should beat the shit out of you for what I went through!” Tears slipped out of his blue eyes. “I was beaten everyday for you! I was harassed for us! US, SASUKE! And what did you do!? You left me broken! Ruined!” He gasped a sob. “I’ve cried more times over you than anything else. Look at me!”

 

Sasuke looked at him slowly, blinking a tear. 

 

Naruto glared. Feeling the anger from before come back. “You want me to come right out and say I hate you. That you’re a monster and should burn in Hell for leaving me like that. Well I’m sorry, Sasuke. I’m sorry to disappoint you because I can’t. You did this! I hope you like it. I hope it’s everything you ever wanted. I’ll never love anyone again, and it’s because I still love you. You BASTARD!”

 

Naruto closed his eyes and brought his hand down. Then something grabbed his arm. His eyes shot open, Sasuke had stopped his hand an inch from his face. “I know I’ve changed you, but you’ve changed me too. I think we both see it. I also know we both need each other.” He pulled Naruto to his chest and held him. Naruto tried to push away, “Sasuke let go! LET GO! SASUKE, STOP! Let me go, Bastard! L-let go.” Sasuke held him tighter as Naruto thrashed, sobbing through his attempts to get away. Naruto shook, pushing at Sasuke to escape. 

 

“Naruto, I’m here.”

 

Naruto shook his head. He didn’t want to be held he didn’t want to remember everything he lost. 

 

“I love you.” 

 

He stopped struggling. Eyes blown wide. 

 

Sasuke spoke again, “Baby, I’m right here. I’m here.” 

 

Naruto’s face contorted in agony, slowly he grabbed onto Sasuke and pulled him closer.  _ I missed you.  _ Sasuke rubbed his back and carded his fingers through the golden hair, whispering reassurances. He pressed his face into Sasuke’s neck and sobbed loudly.  _ I missed you so much.  _ “S-S-Sasuke…. pl-please do-don't leave…..” Naruto gasped loudly and coughed. “Don’t leave me!” He clenched his jaw. Remembering saying those exact same words once before. 

 

Sasuke kisses his head, “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay with you, I’m sorry I left. Baby, I’m so sorry.” Naruto nodded hyperventilating. 

 

“Naruto, breathe. Breathe, it’s okay.” Sasuke held his cheek and wiped the tears away just as Iruka did. But it was different. It would always be different with Sasuke. It would always be right with Sasuke. Naruto stared up at him, tears replacing the ones being wiped away. Sasuke smiled down at him, bright and warm. Naruto choked a little, he missed that. 

 

“Come on. It’s time to go home, you need to rest.” Sasuke stood and held his hand out. Naruto took it and stood with him. They walked out of the playground and down the road back to their home hand in hand. It felt right. It was good again. Naruto felt feeling coming back into him slowly. Just slightly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah yes. Finally they are back together (not really but soon)


End file.
